


Fingerprints on my skin

by SilentRain91



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Don't Like Don't Read, F/F, Feels, Friends With Benefits, Lena/Leslie brotp, Leslie is an asshole, Piercings, Smut, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-07
Updated: 2018-08-27
Packaged: 2019-06-06 19:52:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 36,030
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15202250
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilentRain91/pseuds/SilentRain91
Summary: Lena is known as a player. When Kara Danvers; her shy, new friend, asks her for help because she no longer wants to be the awkward virgin who never even kissed someone, Lena says yes. So what if nobody aside from Lena’s best friend knows Lena is secretly a virgin, too?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This should go without saying, but I guess some people don't have common sense, so I'll repeat it again; do NOT post any of my fics anywhere ever. I do not give permission for this. Posting my fics elsewhere is stealing. If you happen to stumble across one of my works somewhere, know that it was done without my consent.

It all began with a rumor.

Lena never asked to be called a player, yet here she was with that title stuck to her name. It happened during the summer after high school ended. There was a big party full of college people, and she went because her best friend asked nicely.

No, scratch that. Leslie was a bitch who wasn’t familiar with the words please and thank you.

Lena went mostly so she could keep her best friend in check, who at times drank alcohol as if it were water. Someone had to ensure that idiot got home safely, so she assigned herself for that task. Setting foot at that party was her first mistake.

The second one followed two hours later after the majority of the students reeked of cheap beer, poor life decisions, and nachos. Apparently, someone thought it was a brilliant idea to play spin the bottle, such a silly, juvenile game.

Lena thought they all outgrew that game near the end of middle school, but seeing a bunch of college students getting all hyped up about seven minutes in heaven proved her wrong. She played along because what was the harm, right?

Wrong. Students went into the supply closet in pairs while someone locked the door from the outside. Seven minutes turned into fifteen, and everyone came out with lipstick smudged on their skin, and their clothes visibly rumpled or half off.

When that damned bottle landed on Lena, she held her breath. She kissed girls before, sure, and regrettably also one guy who was truly a gay awakening for her, but aside from that, she hadn’t done… well, anything. The furthest she had ever gone was a kiss that deepened, during the summer two years ago, when she briefly dated a girl named Sam.

The bottle spun round and round while students whooped and drunkenly asked who would get to make out with the pretty girl. Lena crossed her fingers and hoped it wouldn’t land on one of the guys. To her relief, it didn’t. She felt she dodged a bullet when the bottle stopped, pointing toward her best friend.

Students hollered, telling Leslie to _‘get it girl’_ when she snagged Lena’s hand and pulled her into the closet. The door closed behind them, engulfing them in darkness.

“I’m sure there’s a switch here somewhere,” Leslie mumbled. “Hey, since we’re here, do you want to make out a little?”

“You’re unbelievable,” Lena muttered, giving her friend a playful shove.

Leslie lost her balance and fisted Lena’s shirt, knocking both of them into the wall together. The students – who no doubt listened on the other side of the door – cheered.

“Can’t blame a gal for trying,” Leslie sighed, breath close to Lena’s lips. “We should at least make it look real though, y’know? I’m not gonna let them think I’m some kind of loser while I’m here to try and score a college chick.”

Lena rolled her eyes because after the summer they would be college girls themselves. “I suppose you have a point,” she admitted, although she didn’t care much what people thought of her.

Oh, how naïve she was back then. Those were the days, but it was all the calm before the storm. Lena never saw it coming until it hit her.

In hindsight, she should have never torn the buttons off of Leslie’s flannel shirt, and she shouldn’t have sucked a hickey onto her neck, even though both were encouraged by Leslie who told her she could do whatever.

If Lena had put the lights on, she would have noticed how disheveled her best friend looked before they exited that closet. Leslie splurged the truth by making it sound as if they had the most mind-blowing sex ever. She told the others at the party Lena was the best fuck she had.

After that, it was a domino effect, leading up to Lena being called a player.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Having an alarm going off was one thing, but ending up with one smacking Lena in the face was another nuisance entirely. “What the fuck, Leslie?” she grumbled, rubbing at her forehead while she swung her legs over the side of her bed.

“Morning, babe,” Leslie yawned, slumped against the wall. “Our toaster broke down again. You gotta fix it.”

“Oh, so you hit me with my alarm clock to motivate me to help you get breakfast?”

Leslie shrugged a shoulder. “I wasn’t gonna, but then that thing went off, and it’s loud as fuck. I ain’t putting up with that shit.”

“Look at the bright side though,” Leslie added on as Lena got up. “I planned on waking you with a bucket of water, but the alarm beat me to it.”

Lena groaned. God, her best friend was completely insufferable at times. If Leslie simply gave her one bloody minute she would have woken up without what felt like the start of an oncoming headache. She padded over to her closet and lifted her shirt over her head, tossing it in the laundry bin in the corner of her bedroom.

“Yo, you got your nipples pierced?” Leslie asked, walking up to Lena for a closer look. “First your tongue, now your tits. How the fuck are you still a virgin?”

“Fuck you,” Lena muttered, selecting black slacks, a belt, and a flannel shirt. It was a bummer how she was a nineteen-year-old sophomore in college who never went further than a kiss, and the only girl who saw her naked was her best friend.

“I mean, if you want, sure.”

“Get out of my bedroom, pervert,” Lena chuckled, shoving Leslie toward the door.

“By the way,” Leslie said, lingering for a moment. “You gotta hit the library or whatever later this evening. I’m having a girl over.”

Lena sighed. Lately, her best friend kept sexiling her, although it was also because she said more than once she didn’t need to hear Leslie’s bed bang against her wall. One of the downsides of being roommates was how thin the walls were.

“You sleep with girls every week,” Lena muttered, grabbing hold of the door. “And yet I’m the one who’s called a player,” she finished as she slammed it shut.

“When’d you get them pierced?” Leslie asked from the other side of the door.

“During the summer. I’d been meaning to get them pierced for some time.”

Lena chucked a large, black shirt over her head. When she opened her door, Leslie stumbled into her. “I’m going to shower first, the toaster can wait,” she mumbled, voice ridden with sleep as she made her way toward the bathroom.

“Fuck you, too,” Leslie grumbled, muttering a string of expletives while she stalked into the kitchen.

“In your dreams, you demon,” Lena replied, grinning while she stepped inside of the bathroom. “You should stop breaking our toaster, by the way! I’m not your technician!”

Lena pierced her tongue and her nipples because she wanted to, not to please someone else. It was her body, after all. Sure, it was a nice bonus if girls were into that sort of thing, but she didn’t particularly count on it. She was surprised it took Leslie this long to notice, although maybe her best friend was finally going to stop teasing her about her nipples being hard.

Leslie had a habit of entering Lena’s bedroom without knocking, in particular when Leslie needed her to fix something. With a little bit of patience, it was a piece of cake to repair the toaster, but her best friend was the type of person who got aggravated and tossed something onto the floor when it stopped working the way it should. Odds were that toaster was either on the floor right now or on the table in pieces.

When Lena emerged from the bathroom, clad in her black slacks, and her flannel shirt all buttoned up, save from the top two buttons, the kitchen smelled of burned eggs and bacon. She tucked her shirt in her pants and fixed her belt.

“Oh fuck yes,” Leslie commented, nodding as she raked her eyes down Lena’s body. The word shame wasn’t in that asshole’s dictionary either. “You should pop more of those buttons and take a selfie, it’ll drive girls crazy, trust me.”

Lena had heard all about that hype, and on more than one occasion she caught her best friend taking such pictures. “I’ll sleep on it.”

“Girls would line up for you more than they already do, that’s all I’m saying.”

“They can take a number, and fuck off or fuck each other, I don’t care. I’m not some kind of snack for them to eat.”

“I won’t disagree with the last bit,” Leslie replied with a wicked grin. “You’re the whole course; breakfast, lunch, dinner, and dessert rolled into one.”

Lena resisted the urge to roll her eyes while she went to have a look at the toaster. “The shower’s empty, just so you know,” she commented, smiling while Leslie muttered how she couldn’t help it she was hella gay.

Lena took the toaster apart so she could put it back together properly. “Which girl are you having over tonight?” she inquired as Leslie did something useful for a change by making coffee. “Anyone I know?”

“Just a random chick, no big deal,” Leslie answered, hissing when she poured coffee onto her hand. “Son of a gun,” she muttered, turning on the faucet, holding her hand under the stream.

Lena arched a brow. “Why are you so jittery if it’s no big deal?”

“Ugh fine, I’m banging Little Lane. Happy now?”

Lena blinked. “I thought you slept with her a week ago,” she recalled, pretty sure she had that right.

Leslie shrugged.

“What happened to your _‘I don’t hook up with the same girl twice’_ rule?”

Leslie shrugged again. “She’s good in the sack, and school got me all stressed. She hit me up, so I didn’t see why not. Rules only exist to be broken anyway.”

Lena begged to differ. She thought of teasing Leslie on how she must have had a crush on the Lane girl because her best friend wouldn’t waste an opportunity to tease her, but she decided not to, considering Leslie always shut down when it came to relationships. If there was any chance her best friend had a thing for Lucy Lane, then she didn’t want to ruin that by talking about the thing Leslie was allergic to; feelings.

“You fix that toaster yet?” Leslie asked as if she couldn’t see with her own two eyes Lena was still working on repairing the damn thing. “I made you some coffee, ain’t that sweet?”

“Said the bitch who threw an alarm clock at my head to wake me up.”

“Geez, tough love this morning. You better down your coffee and get laid, so you don’t look like you’ve got a stick up your ass.”

Lena snorted. “And what’s your excuse exactly?” she quipped, glancing at the coffee in Leslie’s hand, thinking how she had sex all the time, yet she was still a grumpy asshole.

“I should’ve hit you with the toaster instead.”

 

 

* * *

 

 

Lena chose a small table near the window. It was the quietest place in the library, though that wasn’t the only reason why she preferred sitting there. When it rained, it calmed her to watch the droplets run down the glass, and the faint sound helped as well.

The sky was clear so far, though it was getting dark out. She wouldn’t have been here tonight if it wasn’t for Leslie’s last-minute warning she was going to bang a girl. There was a scrape of a chair here and there, and the rustling of books and pages.

Lena barely sat down when she saw a familiar face. “Kara Danvers,” she mused silently as the girl approached her table. “Here to study?”

“Um, no,” Kara answered, adjusting the strap of her backpack, pushing it higher up her shoulder. “I, uh…,” she trailed off, eyes darting around. “I was looking for you,” she whispered, blushing.

Lena automatically smiled and gestured at the chair across from her. She felt bad for Kara when she half-tripped over her own feet, but Kara seemed to catch herself by grabbing on to the table. Kara was a cute, shy girl she befriended a few months ago when her sophomore year began. It happened when they ran into each other in this library, and shared a table because the others were occupied.

“There’s some-something I, erm, I’ve been meaning to… ask you.”

“Ask, and I’ll answer,” Lena replied, smile dropping because Kara wasn’t smiling at all, which was unusual. Kara always smiled at her before without fault. “Unless you want to know my deepest, darkest secret,” she joked with a chuckle, hoping to ease some of the tension radiating off of Kara.

Kara wrung her hands. She barely met Lena’s gaze. Her chest rose and fell visibly with each breath she took. “Okay, I’ll just… say it,” she said, nodding as if she tried to convince herself to spit it out. “I’m wondering if you want to… to, ah, _you know_ ,” she stressed, forming scissors with her hands, moving them together while she trembled just the slightest bit. “I’ve never slept with anyone,” she confessed, dropping her hands.

To say Lena was shocked was a severe understatement. She never, not in a million years, expected Kara to say anything even remotely like that, to propose having sex. Those hand gestures were unnecessary, but she figured Kara made them for the sake of clarity. If this was a joke, it worked, although Kara appeared far too nervous to be kidding.

“Just one time,” Kara added. “I don’t want to be a total virgin anymore. Will you help me?”

“Why are you asking me? This place is swarming with students,” Lena commented, although the thought of some random person possibly taking advantage of sweet, innocent Kara made her cringe.

“It’s just, ah, you, erm… you have a lot of experience,” Kara said so quietly she practically whispered the words. She pushed her glasses higher up the bridge of her nose and chewed her lip. “You’re my friend, and I don’t want to ask someone I don’t know. I know there’s a lot we don’t know about each other yet, which might be better. I’m tired of being nineteen, going on twenty while I’ve never even kissed someone. Like at all. Not even a peck.”

Leave it to Lena to attract this type of attention. At least this was better than some girl attempting to try some kinky stuff with her, although that depended on how she looked at it. She never got far with anyone because every time she had a date, they tried to get in her pants way too fast, and no girl ever took her seriously.

It was rumored Lena slept with more girls than she could count. She had a feeling some of the girls she went on a date with told others they had sex with her to avoid sounding as if they got rejected. The whole player rumor thoroughly ruined her love-life, rendering it non-existent. She hardly got to kiss girls without them begging to be touched.

“I’m so-sorry, forget ab-about it,” Kara stammered, pushing her chair back. “I shouldn’t have asked. I’ll ask someone else. I just want to get it over with, so I’m not the weird outcast who doesn’t even know how to kiss.”

Lena should have let Kara walk away. It wasn’t that hard, and yet it was. As she watched Kara go, her stomach twisted into knots. Her mind went all sorts of places as to who Kara would have her first kiss with, and then a bunch of other firsts. There was a high chance whoever ended up saying yes to Kara’s request would share it with the whole school or worse, post it on social media where it would spread like wildfire.

“Kara, hold up!” Lena called out, flipping off the few students who dared to shush her. She got up and jogged after Kara, placing a hand on her shoulder. “I’ll do it,” she said, keeping her voice down. “But we should establish some rules.”

Lena wasn’t sure what she got herself into. When Kara’s shoulders sagged while her face lit up, she tried not to think of how she agreed to be Kara’s first. Little did Kara know she was a virgin, too. That, and the fact she spent last year admiring Kara from afar because she had a small crush on her.

“Yes, definitely,” Kara agreed, beaming, cheeks crimson. “Thank you so much, Lena. You’re doing me a huge favor.”

Lena tried to be cool by casually leaning against the nearest shelf, but instead, she knocked three books onto the floor. She crouched down to pick them up at the same time Kara did, causing their heads to bump together.

“Golly, I’m so sorry!” Kara whisper-shouted with a grimace.

Lena paused because who even said golly anymore. “Meet me in my room tomorrow, around eight,” she said, gathering the books.

It was silent for a moment.

When Lena stood to put the books back onto the shelf, she noticed Kara’s jaw was ajar. “To discuss the rules,” she explained, inwardly cursing herself for sounding as if she tried to get Kara into her bed right off the bat.

“Oh… right, yes, right… rules, the rules to rule, ah, establish,” Kara replied, movements jerkily at best, sounding as if she was having an aneurysm. “Rules are…im-important,” she nodded. “Good idea.”

Lena put a comforting hand on Kara’s shoulder and gazed into her eyes. “This isn’t a contract, you can say no at any time.”

After exchanging a few more words, Lena wandered around campus. She sent Leslie a text to let her know when the coast was clear while she thought of how to tell her best friend not to be a jerk tomorrow.

Kara had called it a favor. To Lena, this was how she was going to die, slowly.

 


	2. Chapter 2

Lena pulled the door shut behind her, ignoring how she saw Lucy pass her not even a minute ago, one shoe on her foot, hopping like a clumsy kangaroo as she tried to put on the other. Lucy’s hair was messy, and her tank top showed off spots of blue, red, and purple near her collarbones.

“When I texted you to ask if I could come back yet, I didn’t mean kick Little Lane out,” Lena sighed as she toed off her shoes, ditching them on the small square carpet next to the door. “You could have given her two more minutes to get dressed properly first.”

“It’s almost ten. She’s got an early class in the morning, and she wanted to run,” Leslie replied with a shrug.

Lena paused at that. “Is everything okay?”

Leslie grinned like a Cheshire cat. “More than,” she answered, running a hand through her hair. “My bed, on the other hand…not so much.”

“Does it look like I needed to know that?” Lena rolled her eyes, though she was glad to hear nothing was wrong. It seemed a little odd to her how Lucy couldn’t stay for another minute or two to put on her other shoe, but when people were in a rush, they didn’t always act logically.

Lena padded over to the couch and plopped down with a deep sigh. She leaned her head back, blinking up at the ceiling. Footsteps dragged over the floor; god, Leslie ought to lift her feet sometimes rather than sweep the floor with each step. The couch dipped, and when she turned her head to the side, she saw her best friend looking at her.

Leslie nudged Lena’s foot with the tip of her toe. “What gives?”

Lena prepared for possible ridicule or for Leslie to laugh uncontrollably. “Kara walked up to my table at the library,” she revealed, which in itself wasn’t a big deal. “She wanted to ask me something.”

“Yeah?” Leslie hummed. “Something bad?”

“I doubt you’d see it that way,” Lena replied with a shake of her head. She had a feeling Leslie would be more than willing to sleep with a girl, especially when it was someone as beautiful as Kara.

Lena rolled her lips into her mouth and pursed them, evening out her breathing. She knew she could trust her best friend enough to know she wouldn’t go around telling people. Leslie was an asshole, but not that kind of an asshole.

“Thanks to all the rumors that are going around, Kara thinks I’m experienced in bed,” Lena shared, shooting Leslie a quick glare when she snorted. “She asked me to be her first, and I said yes because I don’t want some random student to take advantage of her.”

“Hmm, that’s a big ask. You sure you’re comfortable with that?”

“It’s complicated. She asked for my help, and she’s a sweet girl. I want it to be good for her.”

“I take it the fact you pined after her last year doesn’t hurt you are saying yes,” Leslie commented with a smirk.

“Excuse me for having eyes and for being gay,” Lena replied, shoving Leslie, smiling. “I think I would be comfortable. I’ve asked her to come over tomorrow night so we can sit down, and talk about rules. I think I’d start with a chaste kiss, eventually a deeper kiss, and slowly work up to more. Not only for Kara’s sake but for mine, too. The only problem is she thinks I’m experienced while I’m not.”

“I could give you some tips,” Leslie offered.

“This should be good,” Lena mumbled under her breath.

“Whatever you do, don’t rely on porn because that’s some fake bullshit right there,” Leslie said with a shake of her head. “I’d suggest exploring what you like a little by touching yourself. Nobody knows better how to please a girl than a girl does.”

“I’m going to need a drink for this,” Lena sighed, although she couldn’t say she disagreed with Leslie. She knew how to get herself off, which could give her an idea as to how she could make Kara come.

Leslie got up from the couch. “I smuggled some vodka the other day if you want some,” she explained while she stalked toward their kitchenette.

“Vodka isn’t that great, but I suppose it’s better than lukewarm cheap beer,” Lena replied, and her only aim was to take off the edge a bit, so the drink didn’t matter.

“I’ll walk you through this. You’re gonna be fine,” Leslie said, sounding quite sure of that. She rummaged through the cupboards, grabbing two small glasses. “It’s okay if it doesn’t go smoothly all the way through, you know that, right? The first time is clumsy, awkward, and messy. Often goes with a lot of giggling. You don’t have to be some kind of pro. Besides, how would blondie know anyway, it’s not like she can tell the difference.”

“I’m surprised you’re not being a total asshole for a change.”

Leslie laughed. “You bitch,” she replied, pouring them each a shot of vodka. “The first time I had sex, I didn’t mention I was a virgin. I was winging it, trying to play it all chill until I knocked my head into the fucking headboard. So anyway, I went down on her, like yeah I got this. After a while, I figured I got the hang of it, and she came, and then she goes like _‘can you walk me through what you did cuz I’ve never had sex before.’_ I ended up telling her the truth, and afterward, we had a good laugh, ordered some pizza, and watched a movie.”

“But whatever you do, don’t sweat it,” Leslie continued, offering Lena one of the small glasses. “You don’t have to become a porn star, go with the flow, follow your gut, and don’t beat yourself up for being nervous,” she said, downing her shot. “If you want, I can be your guinea pig. I’m not saying you gotta straight up have sex with me, but I could help you with some basic stuff or whatever.”

Lena drank the vodka in one go, feeling it burn down her throat. She coughed and pounded her fist against her chest. “Jesus, what kind of vodka is this?” she asked, sniffing the glass. “I want another though.”

“Nah, what you need is to get some air. If your little arrangement with that crush of yours messes with your head too much, call it off. Don’t go breaking your own heart.”

“I don’t have a crush on Kara Danvers,” Lena denied vehemently. “I used to, but it passed.”

Kara was a likable girl, sure, but Lena didn’t have feelings for her. Kara was her friend, and in all fairness, they hardly knew one another. On the few occasions where they hung out, they studied together at the library or exchanged notes. Leslie had it all wrong. Kara Danvers wasn’t her crush.

“I bet you didn’t expect your first kiss with blondie to go down that way,” Leslie spoke up, and no, Lena didn’t.

Lena was silent for a moment. She was going to kiss Kara; sweet, shy, sunshiny smile Kara. Leslie was wrong about her not needing a second shot, but she was wrong as well. She didn’t need another glass; she needed that whole damn bottle.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Lena knew there was a reason why as a child, she always heard teachers yell at students not to run through the halls. Here, when people were in a rush, they didn’t always watch where they were going. It was only half her fault when she bumped into someone, considering she had books stacked on top of one another, blocking her view.

Lena assumed others would walk around her, which everyone did, except the one she just ran into. Her books dropped to the floor, and so did those of the frustrating person who knocked into her.

“You should watch where you’re going.”

Lena huffed because that was rich. “Pot calling the kettle black, much?” she grumbled, but that voice sounded familiar, and when she looked up, she made eye-contact with someone she knew or used to, at least.

“Sam?” Lena gasped, crouching down, helping to sort their books, making sure Sam didn’t accidentally take one of hers, and vice versa. “I didn’t know you go to school here.”

“Lena Luthor,” Sam mused with a smile. Her earlier frustration vanished instantly. “You haven’t changed a lick,” she said, eyes mapping Lena’s face and posture. “I heard they call you a player nowadays.”

Lena sighed. “I can’t say I’m surprised,” she replied, re-stacking her books. “Students look at me, and all they see is a player, all because of some rumor.”

“Well, I’m not buying it,” Sam stated, voice serious as she gathered her books, standing back up. “I know it’s been three years, but it doesn’t sound like you.”

Lena arched a brow. It was the first time someone called bull on the rumor of her being a player. Everyone else believed it without question, like a bunch of sheep following the herd. “I can be adventurous, you know?” she commented, feeling the inane urge to avoid coming across as a virgin, even though that was precisely what she was.

“I never denied that,” Sam winked.

Lena shook her head, smiling. “Apparently, you haven’t changed either,” she noted while she tried to figure out how to hold her books without completely blocking her view. “You’re enjoying me being on my knees, aren’t you?” she asked, catching Sam smirk down at her like the tease she was.

Sam opened her mouth, but before she could form a response, a girl with auburn locks jogged up to them and kissed Sam on the cheek.

Sam turned her head to the side. “Can I have a real kiss, babe?”

Lena minded her own business when the girl glanced at her with reddened cheeks.

“Need a hand with those books, Luthor?”

Lena lifted her head, frowning at the girl, though she wasn’t surprised her name was known. The entire campus was familiar with her reputation, which led to even freshmen and seniors knowing who she was.

Being addressed by her last name was something Lena easily loathed. The question was asked in a monotone, dry tone, and while the offer appeared kind, the way it was said made it sound like the girl wanted her to decline politely. It felt too much like _‘I’ll pretend I want to be helpful, but truthfully I don’t give a damn whether you can carry all those books or not.’_

“And who might you be?” Lena asked, unimpressed.

“Alex Danvers.”

Well fuck, Lena didn’t see that one coming. Alex Danvers was Kara’s older sister, which she knew because Kara mentioned her in passing conversations before, but she never knew what the elder Danvers looked like. She swallowed a sudden lump in her throat, wondering if Alex knew about her arrangement with Kara.

“My girl,” Sam said lovingly, snaking an arm around Alex’s waist, almost dropping the books she balanced on one hand. She pressed a kiss close to Alex’s smiling lips before snapping her eyes toward Lena. “We should catch up some time.”

Alex frowned, eyes flitting between Sam and Lena. “You know each other?” she inquired, prying half of the books from Sam’s hands.

Lena didn’t need to stick around for any of that. She got up; view blocked by her books all over again. “As lovely as this is, I have other things to do,” she said, promptly excusing herself.

Lena couldn’t believe she had no idea Sam went to the same school. Three years ago, they lost touch. Sam had to be in her senior year by now, just like Alex, according to Kara. It didn’t seem as if Alex knew what Kara asked of her, which was a relief because she didn’t need any protective big sister drama. Technically, she didn’t do anything wrong. Kara came to her with the whole _‘be my first’_ request, so she shouldn’t worry.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Leslie left ten minutes before eight, in case Kara showed up early, wishing Lena good luck. She walked out the door with a book in her hands, which was a first because Leslie hardly bothered to study unless Lena roped her into studying together.

Lena didn’t question why her best friend went in the opposite direction of the library. With ten minutes to spare, she rushed into the bathroom, checking her clothes and her hair as if she didn’t do so five minutes ago already, and ten minutes before that. Her flannel shirt was buttoned up more than she liked, but she didn’t want to make Kara extra nervous by revealing some cleavage.

Ten minutes went by, and ten more after that. Lena sat on the couch, eyebrows creased together as she ogled her wristwatch. It was almost a quarter past eight, and Kara hadn’t shown up yet, even though they agreed on eight o’ clock. Nobody ever stood her up before, if anything, most girls she hung out with arrived early, eager to spend time with her. Although unfortunately the majority of them only did that in the hopes they could get rid of their clothes fast.

Lena got up, sauntering into the kitchen to look for what was left of that bottle of vodka. Her hand was wrapped around the handle of the refrigerator when two timid knocks sounded on the door. She thought she imagined them at first, but then she heard it again.

Kara fidgeted with her glasses when Lena opened the door. “Hi, I’m here.”

“I can see that,” Lena replied, stepping aside. “I thought you got lost in the library or something,” she joked, adding a brief, dry laugh. “Or that you weren’t going to show up,” she added, biting her tongue because she shouldn’t have said that. She wasn’t upset, it was all fine, and Kara was free to choose whether she came over or not.

“I almost didn’t,” Kara admitted, chewing her lip, plucking at the hem of her shirt. Her eyes traveled, steadily avoiding Lena’s. “I just… I’m nervous, I guess,” she said with a sigh and a weak smile.

Lena thought of telling Kara she didn’t bite, but she figured it was in bad taste. “That’s understandable. I was quite nervous the first time I kissed someone,” she revealed, closing the door. “Would you like a glass of water?”

“Yes, thanks,” Kara answered, looking around the kitchen and the living room. “You were nervous during your first kiss?”

“She said with surprise in her voice.”

“I-I-I…,” Kara stammered, pushing her glasses higher atop the bridge of her nose. “You seem so… confident and well put together. I had no idea you felt that way the first time you kissed someone. Did it get any easier when you had other firsts?”

Lena spilled some water over her hand. She finished up pouring their glasses, nodding her head toward the couch for Kara to sit, taking notice of her crimson cheeks. Now, what was she supposed to say to that?

“When a kiss progressed into something deeper, I wasn’t as nervous as I was before my first kiss,” Lena answered thoughtfully, handing one of the glasses to Kara, keeping the other for herself as they sat down. “It felt natural. I was ready to take that next step, which is important.”

“Can I kiss you?”

Lena choked on a sip of water. God, a little warning would have been nice. She didn’t expect Kara to go from shy to brazen out of the blue.

“Golly, that was too soon wasn’t it?” Kara asked, making a face. “I’m sorry, I don’t know how to go at this, and what the right pace is if there is any. I stared at your lips before at the library, not… not that I’m trying to be some creep or voyeur or anything,” she explained, eyes wide, cheeks flushed. “The thing I asked you is something I’ve been thinking about for a few weeks. I never managed to work up the courage to ask you until recently. You’ve been really kind to me. You’re not a mean girl like some girls claim you are.”

Lena barely kept up with Kara’s stream of words. She wasn’t sure whether to smile and listen because of how adorable Kara was when she rambled, or to tell her to slow down and breathe.

“Kara,” Lena said gently, choosing the latter. “I was hoping we could discuss some rules and boundaries first. You can breathe, you’re doing fine.”

“Rules, yes,” Kara nodded. “And boundaries, of course.”

“And taking a breath,” Lena added with a chuckle. Now that she processed her initial shock, she was tempted to kiss Kara for being cute, but she didn’t want to overwhelm her, and they needed to talk first.

Lena gave Kara a moment to take a few deep breaths, and drink her water while she did the same. Kara’s blue eyes hidden behind her glasses were mesmerizing, and she was overall adorkable. Her blonde locks were loose, perfect for fingers to run through her hair.

Lena forced herself to stop staring. “The rules,” she began, setting her glass down next to Kara’s, folding her hands atop her lap. “Spending the night is out of the question. You won’t stay over at my place, and I won’t stay over at yours.”

“O-okay… that’s fair.”

“And no cuddling either,” Lena added, not needing that type of closeness that merely led to attachment.

“But I like…,” Kara replied while her eyes fell. “Ah, yes, erm, no cuddling. What’s next?”

Lena doubted Kara was genuinely fine with that rule, but she let it slide. “We can go out with other people if we want to, we don’t owe each other anything, and either one of us can end this at any given time without having to explain why. If you decide tonight this is over, then it simply is,” she explained slowly, waiting for Kara to nod. “No terms of endearment or any of those things. You’re Kara, and I’m Lena. No public displays of affection of any kind. No hand holding. This only happens once, and afterward, we won’t speak of it. Do we have an understanding?”

“Yes, I understand. I’ll keep those rules in mind. Rules are important,” Kara answered, nodding her head more than necessary. Her gaze dipped to Lena’s lips, but when Lena looked at her, she averted her eyes.

Lena scooted closer toward Kara until their knees barely touched. “Are you thinking about that kiss?” she inquired with a smile.

Kara sucked her lips into her mouth. She blushed a darker shade of red than Lena thought possible. “Yes,” she confessed, voice high-pitched. “Is it, ah, okay if we… you know, ah, kiss tonight?”

“A peck?”

Kara nodded.

“Are you sure?” Lena checked, observing Kara closely.

“Please.”

It was too early for begging, but Lena wasn’t about to tell Kara that. “Come here,” she whispered, cupping Kara’s jaw. “Slow, okay?”

Kara’s eyes fluttered shut when Lena leaned in, skin warm under Lena’s palm.

Lena closed her eyes, lips melting against Kara’s. Her other hand slid into Kara’s hair when she felt Kara kissing her back. She was blown away by how soft Kara’s lips were, how her mouth moved against hers. Slowly but surely, she pushed Kara down onto the couch without detaching her lips from hers, their bodies pressed flush together.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah yes, just a peck.


	3. Chapter 3

Kara’s hands rested loosely on Lena’s hips, uncertain, seeking.

Lena slowed down, although she was tempted to conquer Kara’s mouth. In the back of her head, a small voice told her to take it easy because this was Kara’s first kiss, ever. God, Kara had revealed to her how she never shared as much as a peck with someone, and now she nearly stuck her tongue down her throat. She couldn’t go too far at once, needed to avoid deepening their kiss.

Lena detached her lips from Kara’s, grunting lowly when Kara chased after them, and she could have sworn she felt Kara tug her down. “Wow,” she whispered, a mere inch away from Kara’s mouth. “Someone is really into kissing,” she couldn’t help but tease.

Kara didn’t stammer a shy comeback. A blush rose to her cheeks, and then her lips found Lena’s.

Lena went with it, deciding to make it memorable, although she had no doubt it would be. She figured Kara was exploring her curiosity as to what kissing felt like, and she was okay with kissing some more. When she made the rules of only doing this once, she was talking about sex. It would be kind of awkward if they just kissed once, and eventually slept with each other without a kiss here and there.

Kara’s confidence to initiate a kiss made Lena’s skin tingle, and she was tempted all over again to slip her tongue into Kara’s mouth. God, since when was she such a horn bag, struggling to control herself? But then she felt Kara open up underneath her, and fuck it, she was only human.

Lena met Kara’s tongue, trying a slow rhythm. Kara didn’t move her tongue much at first, but when she did, it was clumsy and too fast, like the drum of a washing machine, going round and round.

Lena slipped her tongue out of Kara’s mouth, slowing her down with a kiss. “Slow,” she reminded Kara, touching Kara’s lips with the tip of her tongue. “Start with a taste, with seeking entrance,” she explained, running her tongue along the seam of Kara’s lips. “Think of it as a dance. I lead, you follow. I like your enthusiasm though.”

“Okay, and, erm, thanks?” Kara breathed out, hands shifting from Lena’s hips to her back, lifting her head while she drew Lena closer. “Can you, ah, teach… teach me?”

Lena wasn’t going to say no to a beautiful girl, and Kara’s natural sweetness lured her in, so she claimed Kara’s lips. Kara’s breath hitched when Lena used her tongue piercing to her advantage, teasing Kara’s mouth. She took her time prying Kara’s lips apart, circling her tongue around hers.

It barely registered in Lena’s mind she was kissing the girl she had a hopeless crush on for all of her freshman year, but by the time it did, she was too wrapped up and lost in their kiss to give it much thought. Her left hand splayed onto Kara’s chest, feeling Kara’s heart beat beneath her palm.

Every beat was quicker than the last, especially when Lena sucked onto Kara’s tongue, and nipped at her bottom lip. She was in a state of intoxication, drinking Kara in, keeping their bodies close together. Her hips bucked when Kara’s hands moved dangerously low, grabbing her ass. It was a brazen move for someone new at this, for someone overall shy.

Lena tangled her hand into Kara’s hair, tugging, smiling into their kiss when Kara’s hands abandoned her ass because as fun as all of this was, they ought to slow down before this night ended with them dry humping each other.

Kara nipped at Lena’s lower lip, driving her crazy, making her lose her inhibitions as she responded with a kiss, each one hungrier than the last. Kara followed her lessons, starting with a taste, seeking entrance.

Lena felt her phone vibrate in her pocket, releasing a groan at the intrusion. “I have to check this,” she whispered with a sigh, righting herself. “Fuck,” she muttered, running a hand through her hair, seeing how it was almost eleven.

It was a text from Leslie, and before Lena had the chance to type out a response, her best friend sent another. Leslie wanted to know if she was done talking to Kara because she wanted to go to her room to get some fucking sleep. Lena couldn’t believe well over two hours passed. It sure hadn’t felt that long.

Kara scrambled up, looking like a deer caught in headlights while she smoothed her hair and her clothes. “What time is it?”

“Nearly eleven pm,” Lena answered, sending Leslie a text to give her five more minutes to get Kara out the door.

That asshole dared to respond asking if Kara needed to put on her clothes or something, with a wink. Though the fact Leslie didn’t tease right off the bat with her first text was an improvement.

“Oh, no, no, no,” Kara said, grimacing while she shot up. “My sister is going to _kill_ me!”

If there was any sister drama, Lena hoped it stayed far away from her. She could miss it like a toothache. “We’ll set an alarm next time,” she replied with a chuckle to ease Kara’s mind, but her words didn’t even reach Kara.

“I have to go!” Kara blurted out, speed-walking toward the door. “I’m sorry, bye!”

“Okay…”

The door slammed shut.

“Bye,” Lena finished in a whisper, to an empty room.

Lena flopped down on the couch, catching her breath. Fuck, she just French kissed Kara Danvers. They had agreed on a peck, but then she got carried away and pushed Kara down onto the couch like some horny teenager with no self-control. God, she decided to be Kara’s first because she didn’t want anyone to take advantage of her, only to go too far.

Lena had no idea what had gotten into her. With a sigh, she stalked over to the bathroom to take a shower. Her underwear was ruined, all because of a kiss.

 

 

* * *

 

 

“I have a note for you,” a girl with a gorgeous accent and wavy brown hair said as she approached Lena, slipping her a piece of paper with a number scribbled on it.

At first, Lena thought the girl gave her phone number to her, but then she noticed _‘Kara’_ was written at the bottom. She frowned, wondering why Kara didn’t pass this note on herself instead of having someone else do it, and why she didn’t have Kara’s number sooner. Honestly, they were friends for a few months, and somehow they never exchanged their contact information.

“Wait,” Lena said before the girl who was as strikingly beautiful as her voice was could leave. “I’ve seen you before. Irma, was it?”

“Imra,” the girl corrected with a smile that instantly made Lena gayer.

“Imra, right,” Lena replied, smiling apologetically. “We have chemistry together, the class I mean. Not the other kind because we don’t even know each other and that type of chemistry can’t be based on nothing,” she explained, inwardly groaning at being a useless lesbian, but the fact she made Imra laugh at least a little made it worth the embarrassment.

Lena’s explanation was lengthier than it needed to be, but her thoughts wandered, and it irked her when people claimed two people had chemistry with one another when they legit didn’t have any. A couple weeks ago, she watched something with Leslie where a man spoke ill of a woman, and then out of the blue, their group of friends gushed how there was a spark between them. Leslie tossed the remote at their television in frustration, which she couldn’t agree on more.

Imra excused herself, mentioning something vague about a study date.

Lena tapped Kara’s number into her phone to avoid ending up in one of those situations where she lost the note, and wrongly gave the impression she ignored Kara. She decided to text her sometime later. Halfway on her way to her place, it struck her Imra was probably a friend of Kara unless Kara randomly asked someone to pass on her digits.

“Lena!” a familiar voice called out, loud enough to make several heads whip around.

Lena rolled her eyes and turned, facing Sam, arching a brow. “What do you want?” she asked, voice a tad snippy, but the telltale smile Sam gave her told her Sam knew she wasn’t trying to be vicious.

Sam held up a hand, taking a few deep breaths. “I should join Alex on her morning runs more,” she panted, chest heaving. “Anyway, we should grab some pizza together sometime, to catch up. What do you say?”

“Sure, why not,” Lena agreed, as long as there was no jealous girlfriend drama because she didn’t have time for that kind of bullshit.

“Give me your phone, so I can put my number in it.”

“Bossy much?” Lena replied, handing over her phone.

Sam gave Lena a cheeky smile while she typed away, adding her number to Lena’s contacts. “Alex doesn’t complain when I’m bossy.”

Lena bit back a response how Sam should get Alex laid soon because the other day when she met Alex, she came across as a bit of a stuck-up bitch. It didn’t seem wise to say that out loud about Kara’s sister, so she settled on, “good for her.”

Half an hour later, Lena was in Leslie’s bedroom, sitting on her bed while Leslie unbuttoned her flannel shirt, asking herself how she got roped into this.

Leslie reached behind her back, unclasping her bra, sliding the straps down her arms. She fished the flimsy piece of lace out of her flannel shirt in a fluid movement as if she had done it a hundred times, which she probably had, and tossed it to the side.

Leslie’s breasts were barely covered by her shirt, showing a bit of sideboob. “Are you ready?”

“That shouldn’t even be a question. I’ve been sitting here, waiting for the past ten minutes while you got changed in the bathroom.”

“You should take off your bra, too.”

Lena waved Leslie off with a, “soon.”

Leslie slipped her hands into her pockets, grinning smugly, showing off the piercing she had in her navel since her sixteenth birthday, almost four years ago.

The shutter of Leslie’s phone clicked several times as Lena took pictures. Once her best friend appeared satisfied with different poses, she got up to do the same, removing her bra from underneath her flannel shirt.

“I can’t believe I let you talk me into this,” Lena said a couple minutes later when she checked the pictures Leslie snapped. Unlike her best friend, she saved hers onto her phone rather than sending them to someone or posting them on social media.

Leslie grinned. “You’ll thank me later,” she replied, eyes fixated on her screen. “Ladies will dig it, trust me.”

Lena was in the middle of locking her selfies when her phone buzzed. “Did you just send your pictures to me?”

“Yeah, I sent them to all of my contacts,” Leslie answered with a shrug. “I’ll hook up with the first girl who…,” she trailed off when her phone vibrated. “Argh, fuck, it’s Luce.”

“Luce, hm?” Lena teased, smiling when Leslie gave her a push. “I didn’t know you were on a first name basis now.”

“Fuck off,” Leslie muttered, tossing her phone onto her bed.

Lena’s demeanor changed from teasing to concern. “Did something happen?”

Leslie shrugged, flopped down onto her bed, buried her head into her pillow, and groaned. “I fwept wiv hel two mash,” she mumbled, voice muffled. “An no shwe wans to dede me.”

“Leslie, I love you, but I didn’t get any of that,” Lena said, sitting down next to her best friend, brushing her hair to the side, out of her face. “Care to repeat that without your face mushed into your pillow?”

Leslie rolled over onto her back. “First of all, love? Gross,” she grumbled, scrunching up her nose. “Secondly, love you too, babe,” she said, groaning when her phone vibrated again. “I slept with Luce too much, and now she wants to date me. But I don’t do relationships because those only lead to drama, misery, and just, well, nothing good. She asked me out on a date, can you believe that?”

“It’s not that much of a shocker a girl is into you, you’re not that bad,” Lena replied, and whether Leslie agreed or not, it was the truth. “A date doesn’t have to lead up to a relationship though. It could be just that; a date. You could always go out with her, and see how you feel afterward, but if the idea of a date is too gruesome for you, tell her no.”

 

 

* * *

 

 

Lena’s plans to spend her Saturday afternoon at the library flew out the window after she sent Kara a text, and received several in return until they established meeting up. Leslie wasn’t around because she had a meeting with a tattoo artist to discuss a new design she drew, which her best friend wanted to get done on her back someday.

Lena glanced at her watch. Kara texted her she would show up at 2, which gave her roughly eighteen minutes to clean up a bit. Overall, her place wasn’t that messy, but she stayed up late last night with Leslie, and there were empty bottles of beer on the table, along with half-eaten bags of chips.

Seven minutes later, there were a bunch of knocks on the door. With a smile and a flourish, Lena opened the door. “Well look at you, arriving early,” she mused.

Kara blushed and tucked her hair behind her ears, ducking her head. “I was late last time, and I wanted to show you that’s not who I am, so I decided to show up early today, kind of to make up for last time, but also to prove a point, and golly I should have asked if that was okay because I don’t mean to disturb you or steal away more of your time,” she rambled, practically wheezing when she was done.

Lena’s lips were slightly parted while she blinked upon hearing Kara’s stream of words. “Are you nervous?” she asked, smiling softly when Kara held her index finger about two inches away from her thumb. “Take a few deep breaths first. I’ll get you some water.”

A glass of water, a shy smile, and many deep breaths later, Kara followed Lena into her bedroom.

“I don’t know which kind of music you like, but I have quite the collection,” Lena trailed off as she walked over toward her cd’s, which were stacked atop her desk. “Most of these are rock, though I have some other genres as well,” she explained, back turned to Kara while she rummaged through her collection.

“It depends on what kind of music you like,” Lena added, completely missing how Kara came closer. “What’s your taste?”

Lena felt cool, trembling fingers curl around her wrist. She slowly turned around, seeing how Kara’s eyes had darkened with desire.

“This,” Kara answered, cupping the back of Lena’s neck, smashing her lips against hers.

To say Kara caught her by surprise was half correct. Lena didn’t know Kara would initiate a kiss when they entered her room, but after she turned around, she expected as much. Her hands went to Kara’s waist on instinct, reciprocating the kiss while they moved around her bedroom. She hooked her fingers through the loops of Kara’s jeans, keeping her close as their tongues met.

The back of Kara’s legs hit Lena’s bed. They stumbled in a fit of giggles – mostly Kara’s – but it died down when their eyes locked, the two of them mere inches apart, laying sideways. In a split second, they moved closer in a rush, as if they couldn’t get to each other fast enough for their liking.

Lena ended up on top of Kara, kissing the column of her neck, feeling Kara’s hands weave into her hair and nails scrape at her scalp, encouraging her. She kissed Kara’s jaw, working her way closer to her mouth.

Kara released a throaty, needy moan when Lena’s lips melted on hers. The sound was an aphrodisiac, so fucking sexy it made Lena deepen their kiss. Her right hand disappeared under Kara’s shirt, inching up as their lips overlapped, and their tongues danced to a song only they could hear.

Lena’s hand found the cup of Kara’s bra, then Kara’s tongue flicked across her lips, and she pushed the fabric aside, moaning as she palmed Kara’s naked breast.

Kara whimpered into their kiss when Lena gently tweaked her nipple. Lena never went this far with a girl before, but god, she really should because it was a major turn on.

 


	4. Chapter 4

It crossed Lena’s mind to slow down when Kara balled the hem of her shirt in her hand, but she was too wrapped up in the feel of Kara’s lips and the heat of the moment to voice a single coherent thought. So instead, she sat back, pulled Kara with her, and racked up Kara’s shirt.

Kara released a shuddering breath as she lifted her arms. The implication wasn’t lost on Lena as she pushed the fabric higher, freeing Kara from it, exposing her bra. It was blue with a cute little bow in between the cups.

Lena smirked, deciding it suited Kara. “Is this okay with you?” she questioned, catching a blush color Kara’s cheeks.

Kara ducked her head and tucked a lock of her hair behind her ear before she dared to look up with a shy smile. “Yes,” she answered, voice barely louder than a whisper. “You – This is…it’s perfect,” she said, reaching out, hesitating for a second before she put her hands on Lena’s waist.

Lena bit her lip. She never took off her shirt for a girl before, not on purpose at least. Her best friend saw her topless more than once, but that was because that asshole didn’t know the first thing about knocking. Not that it bothered her, she wasn’t ashamed or shy, although the way Kara looked at her as if she was the answer to something she wasn’t even aware of did unnerve her just a little.

“Come here,” Lena uttered, cupping Kara’s cheeks when she noticed her fingers trembling ever so slightly. She hadn’t meant to make Kara lose her courage while she was doing great.

Of course, Lena was supposed to be some sort of player with lots of experience, so her slowness must have made Kara feel as if she did something wrong. Kara probably assumed she got rid of her clothes fast around girls. Damn that rumor. It wasn’t that Lena never tried to tell anyone it wasn’t true, but she had an active reputation as a player, so it was easier not to waste her breath.

Lena sighed, needing to get out of her head. She was unnecessarily overcomplicating things, and it didn’t matter what Kara thought of her. All they were to each other was friends, who got into an arrangement because she agreed to help Kara.

Kara’s lips connected with Lena’s, tentative and slow at first as if it was their first kiss all over again. But then she grew bolder, more confident when she sought entrance to Lena’s mouth, caressing the seam of her lips with the tip of her tongue.

Lena parted her lips, melting into everything that was Kara. Hands disappeared under her shirt as their tongues rolled over each other. She felt Kara’s hands inching higher, getting dangerously close to her breasts.

Biting back a groan, Lena broke their kiss. “Wait,” she whispered, getting rid of her shirt, exposing her black bra.

Kara tilted her head to the side, eyebrows creasing together while she stared at Lena’s bra, at the small, barely visible outlines of Lena’s nipple piercings. She chewed her lip like she was trying to figure it out.

“Um…,” Kara began, clicking her tongue against the roof of her mouth. “You… do you… um.”

“Cat got your tongue?” Lena teased with a smirk, and oh, she quite liked this.

“I think you did,” Kara replied, cheeks so red it was a surprise she didn’t pass out on the spot.

Lena smiled, deciding to cut Kara some slack. “I have nipple piercings,” she revealed, unclasping her bra to show Kara because she might as well.

Kara’s jaw dropped while her eyes fell to Lena’s breasts. For a solid five seconds, she didn’t utter a single word or sound, and it was possible she wasn’t breathing either. She slowly closed her mouth, still staring at Lena’s nipple piercings.

“I had them pierced during the summer,” Lena explained, though she doubted it mattered, and she wasn’t sure if Kara was listening to her.

Lena never had someone scrutinize her body that much before. It was adorable, at first, but now she began to feel self-conscious and more aware of the situation at hand. God, maybe taking off her bra was a mistake. She didn’t mean to break Kara like that. The silence was deafening.

“Kara?”

Kara’s head snapped up so fast she could have gotten a whiplash. “Yes?” she replied, voice high-pitched, cheeks crimson. “Golly, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to stare!” she blurted out, although Lena had a feeling she did mean to, which was fine, to a degree.

“It’s just, I, ah,” Kara continued, scratching the back of her neck. “I’ve never seen someone with nipple piercings before, not that I’ve seen that many boobs or any aside from my own. I mean, erm, there’s the internet, but that’s different, and I never actively sought for that sort of thing. On the internet, you never really know what’s real and what’s fake anyway, but erm, that’s not, ah, my point. You have nice boobs,” she rambled, cheeks reddening, apparently going for fifty shades of red.

Kara’s eyes widened significantly, so much it was comical. “Nice boobs as a totally platonic thing I observed!” she explained hastily.

Lena tipped her head back and laughed. “God, Kara, you’re a dork,” she sighed out with a smile. “It’s fine, don’t worry about it. You’re curious, and that’s okay. I’m here to help you, not to judge you.”

Kara mumbled something about evening the playfield, and then she promptly took off her bra. Her breasts were smaller than Lena’s, but they were nicely shaped, and her areolas were darker. Goosebumps erupted on her arms while Lena looked at her.

Lena lifted her eyes up, watching how Kara chewed her lip, figuring she should say something to make her feel less nervous. “Those are by far the best boobs I’ve seen,” she blurted out, and seriously, she had to go and be a useless lesbian, at this particular moment?

She wanted to take her words back somehow to say something better, but then Kara blushed another shade of red and cracked a smile. “Really?” she asked, glancing down at her boobs as if to check Lena was genuinely talking about those.

Lena was confused for a moment why her comment surprised Kara so much, but then it hit her being a so-called player included having seen dozens of boobs. Kara probably thought she slept with fifty girls or something like that, or at least, so some of the rumors claimed, so Kara must have taken her words as a huge compliment.

Lena’s train of thoughts stopped when Kara’s lips chased hers. She gave in to the feeling, falling down atop her mattress with Kara, mouths connected in a lust-filled kiss. Her hands grabbed Kara’s hips, humming quietly as Kara’s hands cupped her boobs.

Kara didn’t squeeze, didn’t knead. Instead, she ran the pads of her index fingers over Lena’s nipples, tracing her piercings with a butterfly-light touch.

Lena gasped at the contact. She pulled Kara closer, rolling her hips into hers. In the heat of the moment, she littered Kara’s neck with open-mouthed kisses, moving down to her collarbones, nipping gently here and there.

Kara let her hands fall to her sides, breaths uneven as Lena’s mouth traveled down her chest. “Le-Lena,” she whimpered, writhing while Lena’s tongue licked a path from her breasts to her belly button.

Lena was in no way an expert or knew precisely what she was doing, but she tried to play it by hand, following her gut and paying attention to how Kara reacted to what she did. She dipped her tongue piercing in Kara’s belly button, taking a deep breath, eyes lighting up when she noticed it made Kara squirm.

Lena slowly dragged her tongue back up Kara’s body, toward her pulse point before she kissed her jaw. “Are you okay?” she questioned with a frown, noting the way Kara shook just a little.

“Y-yeah,” Kara answered, voice coming out raspy and dry. She swallowed and licked her lips when Lena kept gazing at her. “I just… I, uh, this is… erm…”

“Uncharted territory?” Lena filled in, and she understood, she really did. “We can stop.”

“I don’t think I want to stop,” Kara replied, trailing her fingertips up Lena’s arms. “I li-”

Whatever it was Kara wanted to say, she took it back and didn’t look like she was going to spit it out. There was a glint in her eyes, and an unspoken softness while her hands stilled as they reached Lena’s shoulders. Her gaze landed on Lena’s lips as she took a shaky breath. She opened her mouth, closing it again. It had to be on the tip of her tongue.

Lena wasn’t sure who leaned in, but next thing she knew, she and Kara were kissing again. She didn’t let up until her lungs forced her to pause to take a breath. And when she did, her chest heaved, and her head spun. Locking lips with Kara was intoxicating, dizzying, and god she was really gay.

Moments later, Lena was on her back, and Kara’s head was on her chest. It was surprising how much of her energy got drained, yet she felt as if she would never tire of kissing Kara. She ran her fingers through Kara’s slightly tousled locks while she thought of how it looked like they were cuddling.

Lena’s fingers were about to come to a halt, and she thought of untangling herself when Kara spoke up.

“I could easily fall asleep like this,” Kara hummed, nuzzling closer, arm draped around Lena’s waist. “It’s relaxing. If I close my eyes, I’ll probably sleep for a little while. I can hear your heartbeat… thump, thump, thump.”

Lena cracked a smile and resumed carding her fingers through Kara’s hair, staying right where she was. She resisted the urge to press a kiss to the top of Kara’s head, deciding she had to draw a line somewhere while she pretended they weren’t breaking one of the rules she set.

“So nice,” Kara murmured, taking a deep breath, exhaling with a soft sigh. “You’re a good kisser. Has anyone ever told you that before? I bet they have, lots of times or all the time because your lips are soft, and it’s like I’m in heaven or floating on a cloud somewhere.”

Lena chuckled. “Dork,” she whispered, kissing the top of Kara’s head just because.

Kara said something, but her voice was too quiet, and her cute dinosaur-like yawn didn’t help Lena understand her any better either. Kara shifted a couple of inches, fitting her head in the crook of Lena’s neck.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Lena rapped her fingers onto the counter while she waited for the coffee machine to finish brewing a cup of some very much needed caffeine. Her afternoon went by fast, and before she knew it, Kara had to go. It was different than last time though, which was what she couldn’t stop thinking about, couldn’t stop comparing.

Last time, Kara didn’t give Lena a kiss before she left.

Last time, Kara left in a rush, eyes wide in panic because they lost track of time.

This time, they lost track of time, too. But Kara was slow to leave because when her lips met Lena’s, both of them got carried away. Although it was possible Kara simply went with it for the sake of their arrangement. She couldn’t get a handle on Kara’s thoughts and feelings.

The coffee machine beeped when it was done, causing Lena to jolt. Her fingers left the counter, opening the drawer with one hand while her other reached for the refrigerator. It was about time she could relax with her drink. Then again, caffeine wasn’t the best choice, and she was only making herself jittery.

Lena sighed audibly. “I think I’m in trouble,” she stated while she added a dash of milk and some sugar to her coffee, stirring it with a spoon.

Leslie looked up from the parts of the toaster she spread out on the table in front of her. Of course, that asshole managed to wreck the thing again. “Yeah?” she inquired, poking at the pieces with a screwdriver.

“Yeah,” Lena replied, nodding her head slowly. She wrapped her hand around her cup, the heat of it just bearable to hold on. “I broke one of my rules,” she sighed, bringing her coffee up to her lips, blowing over the hot liquid before she took a sip.

“The cuddling one?” Leslie guessed, grinning when Lena groaned. “Figures, I’ve always known you’re mushy on the inside.”

“Thanks, you’re such a helpful friend.”

Leslie shrugged a shoulder. “I try.”

“We went further than a kiss,” Lena revealed. She took a bigger sip from her coffee, almost scalding her tongue. “Our shirts came off. We were in my bedroom and-”

“Whoa, back up,” Leslie interrupted, tossing the screwdriver aside. “Here,” she said, pulling back the chair closest to her. “Come sit with me, and put that cup down before you drop it and burn yourself.”

Lena glanced down at her hand, watching how unsteady it was as it shook. She peeled herself away from the counter, willing her legs to move. “I can’t stop thinking,” she sighed out, putting her cup down on the table, taking the seat next to her best friend.

“About Kara,” Lena added, meeting Leslie’s gaze as her friend hummed faintly, processing the information.

Leslie grabbed Lena’s hand and gave a squeeze. “You like her, hm?” she commented, no taunting, no grin or smirk, just an open statement of the truth.

Lena managed a nod, squeezing Leslie’s hand back in gratitude. She knew how much her best friend loathed touching people unless she was being intimate with a girl, so it meant a lot to her Leslie tried to anchor her.

“I think… if we’d have taken off our pants, we might have gone all the way,” Lena realized. “The heat of the moment made it near impossible to take it slow. She initiated a kiss and the fact she was bold enough to do that turned me on. I took a shower after she left.”

Lena blew over the remains of her coffee, downing her beverage while she tried to process the situation. “I think I might still have that crush on her,” she admitted, more to herself than to Leslie.

“The heart wants what it wants, Lee,” Leslie replied, patting the back of Lena’s hand with her other hand. “If I were you, I’d break off that arrangement before you end up hurt. You can’t pretend it’s all casual while you have feelings for her. Are you sure you’d want to have your first time with some girl who’s just looking to lose her virginity?”

“Kara Danvers is not _some_ girl,” Lena disagreed, though she understood Leslie was trying to look out for her. “It’s just a crush, it’s not like I’m in love with her yet.”

“Yet,” Leslie pointed out.

Lena’s eyebrows knitted together. “Hm?” she inquired, a little bit distracted to concentrate properly. “What do you mean yet?”

“That’s what you said. You just told me you’re not in love with Kara _yet_ , which to me sounds like you’re falling for her.”

Lena shook her head. She might have misspoken a minute or so ago, but she wasn’t falling in love with Kara. All she had to do was make sure she didn’t break more rules and reinforce some boundaries. Today, she cuddled Kara in a moment of weakness. She wouldn’t allow that to happen again, regardless of how good it felt to hold her.

“I’ll figure it out,” Lena said with a final shrug. “So,” she started, curling her fingers around her coffee mug. “How are things between you and Lucy?”

“There’s no thing,” Leslie scoffed, returning to her grumpy self as she prodded the toaster. “She asked me out, and I said no. Whatever fling we had is over, which reminds me you might wanna leave tomorrow, I invited a girl over.”

“Are you sure you don’t like Lucy?” Lena questioned carefully. “I know you, and I know you have this rule where you don’t sleep with the same girl twice. But you did, with Lucy. Breaking rules for someone is saying something.”

“At least I’m not out there trying to get my heart broken.”

Lena sighed. “I guess we’re both in denial. There are more ways than one to get your heart broken though, you know?”

“I’m fine, you don’t have to worry about me,” Leslie muttered while she gathered the pieces and scraps from the toaster. “Worry about this thing, it keeps dying on me.”

“I’m going for a walk first. You don’t need toast until tomorrow morning, and right now, I want to get some air.”

Lena got up, shrugged on her black leather jacket, put on her boots, grabbed her phone, and walked out the door. It was dark out, but it didn’t matter. The air was crisp and refreshing, exactly what she needed to clear her head. She hardly made it seven paces through the hall when she bumped into someone.

“Think of the devil, I was just looking for you.”

 


	5. Chapter 5

“I see you haven’t lost your touch for flattery,” Lena said, righting her jacket, slipping her phone into her pocket. “Any reason why you were looking for me at this fine hour? How about you start with how the hell you know where my place is.”

“Oof, bad day?” Sam replied as the beginning of a smile tugged at her lips. “I’ve asked around. Some girls on campus are surprisingly informative.”

Lena sighed because of course, one of the girls she went out with must have told Sam. It wasn’t a secret where she lived, and in the end, it didn’t really matter how Sam knew. She hadn’t meant to sound as snappy as she did.

“You look like you could use a drink,” Sam noted, and she wasn’t wrong.

“Some of us aren’t twenty-one, you know,” Lena pointed out, reminding Sam she didn’t even turn twenty yet. She could get away with buying alcohol, depending on how strict a place was, but it wasn’t a good idea right now.

Sam’s smile changed into something sly. “I didn’t peg you for someone who follows the rules. Maybe you’re not a rebel after all.”

Lena smiled back because dammit Sam was such a devil. “Encouraging young people to drink,” she commented dryly. “Way to be a role model.”

“We could grab some smoothies, it’s too late for coffee,” Sam suggested as they walked through the hall together. “You still drink those icky kale smoothies, right?”

Lena blinked once. “You remember,” she replied, clearing her throat because this wasn’t about semantics. She automatically assumed Sam long forgot such seemingly insignificant details. “They’re not icky, they’re healthy.”

“Something being healthy doesn’t make it taste good,” Sam said, scrunching up her nose. It was a fair point, tastes differed for each individual. “Anyway, how have you been?”

“Same old, mostly. There isn’t much to say,” Lena answered, although she realized it had been a couple of years, and some things did change, such as her reputation. Back in high school, she easily stayed under the radar, but her summer before college made her the most talked about.

“Does the rumor mill bother you?”

“No,” Lena said on instinct, though perhaps it did somewhat. She liked to believe she could brush it off and let it be. “It is what it is,” she sighed, following Sam to cross the street, toward the place that was always open late for the night owls among the students, and the insomniacs. “How have you been?”

“Deflecting so soon?” Sam replied with the hint of a smile, and yes; perhaps Lena did that, but the rumors weren’t worth discussing.

The little bell above the door jingled as Sam and Lena entered the diner together. The lights inside were dimmed. It was close to empty, aside from three people occupying a table near the bar. Their conversation was hushed, and one of them had a book. 

A bartender stood behind the bar with a towel swung over her right shoulder. She had brown hair that fell a little past her shoulders, hazel eyes which sparkled beneath the dim light which hung above her, and the button up shirt she had on pinged Lena’s gaydar as the youthful woman shot her a smile. That, and the rainbow bracelet around her wrist.

Lena stalked over toward a small table near the window, sitting down across from Sam. Her eyes flit briefly toward the street light illuminating the road. She soaked in the calmness of this late hour, how there was no traffic passing by.

“I’ll have a pineapple mango smoothie,” Sam spoke up, bringing Lena’s attention back to the diner.

Lena’s eyes traveled up, catching a glimpse of the bartender’s smile before their gazes met. “Are you new here?” she inquired, toying with a strand of her hair. She never saw this woman before, and as a reasonably frequent customer, she would have noticed her.

“I am. My name is Siobhan,” the bartender answered, clicking her pen, notepad in hand. “Do you come here often?”

“Now and again,” Lena replied, curious as the bartender wrote something down while she hadn’t even voiced her order yet. “Maybe I’ll stop by more,” she considered.

“I take it I’ll see you around then. I’m picking up extra shifts.”

“I’ll have a kale smoothie, thank you.”

Siobhan ripped the paper from her notepad. “Coming right up,” she said with a wink, putting down the note in front of Lena, and with that, she turned around and walked toward the bar.

Lena looked at the piece of paper, seeing a number was scribbled on it.

“I see you haven’t lost your touch,” Sam commented with a grin.

Lena folded the note and slipped it into her pocket. “I hardly did anything.”

“You flirted with her. I wouldn’t call that hardly doing anything.”

Lena felt her cheeks heat up, and okay, Sam had a point. God, it was a good thing she didn’t try and order an alcoholic drink. She hadn’t meant to flirt with the bartender, it just happened. Siobhan was an attractive woman.

A few minutes later, Sam sipped from her smoothie, smiling curiously at Lena.

Lena rolled her eyes. “What?” she sighed, taking a drink from her kale smoothie, ignoring the fact the bartender said the drinks were on her.

“She was practically fucking you with her eyes. Are you going to give her a call sometime?”

“You do realize we’re still here, right?” Lena pointed out.

To be fair, she wasn’t sure if it was a good idea, not while she had to figure out what to do about Kara. She was free to date other people, considering she came up with that rule, but something about going out with someone while having that arrangement with Kara made her stomach twist. Lena could break off her agreement with Kara, though she wasn’t sure she wanted to because then Kara would seek out someone else, which was terrible. It wasn’t good because Kara could end up asking someone who would hurt her.

“Are you going to tell me why you were looking for me this late on a Saturday night?” Lena questioned, remembering Sam hadn’t explained that yet. Their peers went out, slept early to get some more hours or visited their family. But they didn’t go to a close to vacant diner with an ex.

Granted, three years passed, going on four, and it was never that serious between Sam and Lena, though it was still somewhat unusual. She had to adjust to this, to them hanging out, potentially as friends.

“I was free tonight, and I was wondering if it was a good time for you to catch up,” Sam answered, emptying the rest of her smoothie. “It was a pity we lost touch after I left high school. We used to be close,” she sighed, tracing the tip of her finger around the rim of her glass.

Lena wondered why they never ran into each other a year ago, when she was a freshman, though admittedly college was crowded, and they didn’t share any classes with her being a sophomore while Sam was a senior.

Lena agreed she and Sam used to be close, although Leslie was always her best friend. There was no malice between Sam and her, they never had a bad fallout, but it was an adjustment nonetheless to have Sam back in her life.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Lena felt around in her pockets. This wasn’t happening. No, no, no. With a deep sigh, she had to conclude that yes, it was. If she would have rushed less to get some air, then she would have remembered to grab her keys. But no, those were in her room. She banged on the door with her fist while her other hand whisked her phone out of her pocket.

It was a little past midnight. Too soon for Leslie to be asleep unless she went out sometime after Lena did, which made it possible Leslie wasn’t returning tonight.

Lena gave up on knocking, dialing her best friend’s number. “God, this isn’t happening,” she groaned when it went straight to voicemail.

Sam leaned her elbow against the wall. “Problem?” she asked, frowning at Lena as Lena shoved her phone back into her pocket.

“You could say that,” Lena answered, pressing her back against the door. “I’m locked out.”

“Today’s not your day, I take it,” Sam noted, and yeah, it sure as hell wasn’t. “You can crash at my place if you want. I don’t have a roommate because I only have one bedroom. You could take the couch unless you’re still a cuddle bug.”

“I’m not a cuddle bug,” Lena denied immediately.

At Sam’s smirk, Lena rolled her eyes and said, “I was sixteen, give it a rest.”

“It was cute,” Sam replied, shrugging a shoulder, smiling.

“I don’t associate myself with that word.”

Sam peeled herself away from the wall. “I’m going to call it a night,” she announced, walking away. “Are you going to keep standing there all night or are you coming with me?”

“Dammit Leslie,” Lena muttered under her breath as she caught up with Sam, although she knew it was her fault for forgetting her keys.

The air was getting colder, not ideal to stay out in the hall. Lena wasn’t sure what she would have done precisely if Sam hadn’t offered she could stay over in her room. It was the first time she forgot her keys. Usually, it was Leslie who tended to go out without those. She sent her best friend a quick text, in case Leslie planned on turning on her phone anytime soon.

Sam’s place was small, but it had the basics. There was a couch, a round coffee table, a kitchen area with a table, a bathroom, and a bedroom.

“Couch or my bed?” Sam asked while she dug through the drawer in her closet.

Lena held out a hand to accept the shirt and the sweatpants Sam handed her. “I’ll take the couch,” she decided, figuring sleeping in Sam’s bed was somewhat inappropriate, not to mention awkward because they were in a stage of rekindling a friendship. She didn’t want to put herself in a position where she could end up spooning Sam, which was likely if they shared a bed.

“I’ll get you a pillow and a blanket while you get changed in the bathroom.”

Lena nodded. “Thank you for this, Sam. I owe you one.”

“You don’t owe me anything,” Sam replied with a wave of her hand. “You got me a free smoothie, remember? I’d say that makes us even.”

Lena slipped into the bathroom. She took off her clothes and changed into the ones Sam gave her. The sweatpants were a snug fit because Sam’s posture was slender and less curvy than hers, but they weren’t uncomfortably tight. The shirt was loose, even for her.

Lena got lucky Sam had walked her home yet it didn’t feel that way. She was disappointed in herself for forgetting her keys. Sleeping on a couch wasn’t how she pictured her Saturday night to go down. She wondered where her best friend went, finding it odd she didn’t receive a single text.

When Lena walked out of the bathroom, Sam had prepared the couch with a pillow and a blanket. “There’s an extra blanket on the table, in case you get cold,” she told Lena.

“If you change your mind, you know where to find me,” Sam said with a wink as she padded toward her bedroom. “Good night, Lena.”

Lena didn’t intend on changing her mind. “Good night, Sam.”

Lena got onto the couch, nuzzled her head into the pillow, pulled the blanket up, and stared at the ceiling. She wasn’t sure how much time went by, but eventually, she drifted off to sleep, hoping she would run into Leslie tomorrow so her best friend could unlock the door for her.

The morning arrived all too soon when Lena got nudged awake by Sam around nine, and yet she didn’t get up early enough. Not for lack of trying because the moment Sam stirred her, she got dressed and ready to leave. Maybe she should have taken her chances with the hall after all.

Lena didn’t even make it one foot out of the door yet when she came face to face with Alex and also Kara. The look Alex gave her went from stunned to murderous.

Sam sighed behind Lena. “You should go,” she told Lena. “Al, baby, it’s not what it looks like.”

“The biggest player on campus walking out your door on a Sunday morning isn’t what it looks like?” Alex replied while her eyes glossed over, and the vein on her neck looked like it was going to burst. “How am I supposed to interpret your ex sleeping over at your place? What, did she stumble into your bed?”

Lena clenched her jaw. Alex Danvers was one of the last people she wanted trouble with. Sam must have told Alex how they used to date almost four years ago. She glanced at Kara who did nothing but stare blankly at her without blinking.

“We’re leaving,” Alex said while she grasped Kara’s hand. “Our breakfast plans are canceled.”

Lena didn’t know what to say as she watched their retreating forms as Sam ran after Alex, telling her she could explain. Meanwhile, Kara whispered things in Alex’s ear and squeezed her shoulder.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” Lena hissed, balling her fists. She didn’t want Kara to think she slept with her sister’s girlfriend. God, she wasn’t that kind of person. She would never ever try something with someone who was taken.

 

 

* * *

 

 

“Earlier today,” Lena began with a sigh. She was surprised Kara showed up on her doorstep at 7pm, especially today out of all days. “It wasn’t what it looked like,” she said, almost pleadingly so. “Nothing happened between Sam and me. I can explain.”

Kara sucked her lips into her mouth for a moment. Her eyes slowly traveled up to meet Lena’s. “It’s okay, you don’t owe me an explanation,” she replied, and right, Lena didn’t.

Lena nodded, hoping there wouldn’t be any weird energy between them now. She was allowed to do what she wanted with other people, her arrangement with Kara wasn’t a relationship, and they weren’t dating, but it bothered her if Kara would ever think she would try something with a girl who wasn’t available.

It was bad enough Lena had a false reputation as a player. She didn’t need another about being a home wrecker. She wondered if Sam talked it out with Alex and if Kara knew she slept on the couch without any funny business happening.

Before Lena had the chance to try and explain, even though she didn’t have to, Kara’s insistent lips were on hers, catching her off guard. This kiss was different from their previous ones. It was hungrier, needier, and much rawer. There was no softness. It felt like a punishment.

Kara pushed Lena’s back against the wall, sneaking her hands under Lena’s shirt while she kissed her, hard. Her teeth nipped at Lena’s lower lip, almost intense enough to draw a bit of blood as she tugged at Lena’s shirt as if she aimed to tear it off, and maybe she did.

Lena wanted to tell Kara to slow down, but she felt like she deserved this. It didn’t matter it was too rough. She felt her gut twist in guilt for flirting with Siobhan at the diner last night, despite being allowed to do what she wanted, and she wished she wouldn’t have forgotten her keys or that she would have passed up Sam’s offer to spend the night.

Kara slowed down when Lena stopped kissing back. There was a watery glint in her eyes one second, gone the next as she took a shaky breath. She wrapped her arms around Lena, hugging her tight.

Lena allowed Kara to bury her head in the crook of her neck while she caressed Kara’s back. “I was about to watch a movie,” she said, almost whispering, voice thick with emotions she didn’t know how to express. “Would you like to watch it with me?”

Kara nodded, but she didn’t let go. If anything, she held on tighter.

Lena wasn’t sure if Kara was upset because Alex was this morning or if Kara had different reasons for needing such a firm hug.

The door flung open and slammed shut, causing Kara to let go of Lena abruptly.

Leslie knelt down in front of the sink, paying Kara and Lena no mind while she muttered quietly, rummaging through the closet. She got back up, a bottle of vodka in hand, and slammed the door again on her way out.

Lena frowned. She grabbed her phone, sending her best friend a text to ask if she was going to come back tonight. In hindsight, she shouldn’t have let Leslie leave with that bottle.

While Kara went to sit on the couch, Lena poured them a glass of water each and grabbed a bag of chips. She set it all down on the coffee table, taking a seat next to Kara under Kara’s watchful gaze.

Kara cupped Lena’s jaw. “Your lip,” she whispered, running her thumb across Lena’s bottom lip. She bit hers for a second, voicing a muffled, “I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine,” Lena assured her. It didn’t matter how her lip felt a little tender.

Kara swung her leg over Lena’s, slowly lowering herself as she looked into Lena’s eyes. She leaned forward, kissing Lena as if she was made out of glass. It was soft, tentative, merely a flutter of her lips.

Lena let herself melt into Kara’s apology. She knew Kara never meant to kiss her as hard as she did moments ago, but she also knew Kara had needed it for reasons she could only guess at best. Her heart bled while Kara’s tongue caressed hers, and she felt Kara’s fingertips on her skin as if it was the first time they touched. She knew, then, her feelings didn’t stop at having a crush on Kara.

Leslie was right; Lena was going to break her own heart because this was nothing but an arrangement to Kara. She had to remind herself they were just friends, and Kara Danvers didn’t love her.

 


	6. Chapter 6

Credits rolled on the screen when Lena blinked her eyes open. She wasn’t sure when she fell asleep, but she must have at some point during the movie. The second thing she realized was the fact her head was on Kara’s lap, and Kara ran her fingers through her hair. She thought about drifting off for five more minutes, but then Kara’s gaze shifted from the television to her.

A smile tugged at the corner of Kara’s lips. Her cheeks darkened a bit, though that might have been due to the dim glow of the television in the background. “Oh, hey, you’re awake,” she whispered, fingers coming to a halt. “You, ah, you dozed off during the movie.”

“Mhmm,” Lena hummed, wishing Kara would resume combing her fingers through her hair because Kara was right, it did feel nice. “I didn’t mean to fall asleep. Did I crush you?”

Lena peeled herself away from Kara’s lap, even though deep down, she didn’t want to move an inch. She hoped she didn’t awkwardly fall on top of Kara. When the movie began, they sat close next to each other, legs almost touching, but she must have shifted a lot to end up with her head on Kara’s lap. She didn’t remember doing any of that.

“No, no, not at all!” Kara rushed out while she shook her head. “I, erm, I… moved you a little bit,” she revealed, tucking her hair behind her ears, sinking her teeth into her lower lip.

Lena found it cute when Kara got all shy. She could ask more questions or try to quip something, but she wanted to cut Kara some slack, and it seemed better to resist the temptation of teasing her. What she failed to stop, however, was her hand shooting out, thumb brushing Kara’s lips to prevent her from biting them.

Kara parted her lips, chest heaving ever so slightly as she took in a deep breath. She gave Lena a strange, curious look, which was hard to decipher.

Lena felt the tip of Kara’s tongue with her thumb. It lasted only a split second before she lowered her hand, watching as Kara closed her mouth. She leaned in, dodging Kara’s lips to press a kiss to the corner of them instead, deeming it innocent enough. She could have sworn she heard Kara swallow hard, though the music accompanying the credits of the movie might have made her falsely think she did, while in reality, she hadn’t.

“I’ll get us a refill,” Lena sighed softly, definitely in need of some water right now. She got up from the couch and grabbed their glasses, ignoring the fact they were half-full.

Lena thought of suggesting watching another movie as she stalked over to the kitchen area, but it was Sunday, and the clock on the microwave told her it was a quarter past nine. Both Kara and she had classes tomorrow. It wasn’t an ideal time to start up another, and frankly, she didn’t want to fall asleep on Kara again.

Kara sighed when Lena handed her glass to her. “Thanks,” she mumbled, staring into her drink. “I’m sorry about earlier. I shouldn’t have been so rough.”

Lena hated seeing Kara feel bad. “Some people are into that, you know?” she replied with the hint of a smile, pleased when Kara spared her one in return. “Maybe not _that_ rough,” she conceded with a dry chuckle, “but you’re still learning.”

“You don’t have to excuse my behavior for me, Lena.”

Lena’s eyebrows shot up. She sipped from her water, unsure what to say because Kara was right. The seriousness in Kara’s voice and expressions on her face had no trace of shyness or stumbling nervousness.

“I made a mistake,” Kara confessed, setting her glass down on the table. She folded her legs, resting her hands on her knees. “I hurt you, and the worst part is I think I meant to.”

Lena grasped that much when Kara’s kiss was too rough and too raw. She wanted to ask why, but she wasn’t sure if she was ready to hear the answer. It must have been linked to leaving Sam’s place in the morning. She had no idea what went on in Kara’s head. It didn’t help how one of the rules was to not sleep over at each other’s place.

Kara was her friend while Sam was Lena’s ex. She couldn’t begin to imagine what Kara thought about her sleeping over at Sam’s while she wouldn’t stay over at Kara’s place. It was unplanned, of course, and she didn’t have to explain herself to Kara in any shape or form, but it still felt like a shitty thing to do.

“I’m sorry,” Kara said again, refraining from expressing why she did what she did.

Lena was surprised she didn’t receive a slap in the face from Alex, and from Kara for upsetting her sister, even though she hadn’t actually done anything. No, she did, she should have known better than to accept Sam’s offer. She could have returned to the diner. 

“Maybe we should put a stop to our arrangement,” Kara spoke with uncertainty, wringing her hands together.

“Maybe,” Lena parroted as she tried to keep her emotions at bay. “If that’s what you want.”

Kara was silent for a moment. All she did was gaze into Lena’s eyes as if she was trying to find something. Seconds ticked by. The credits on the screen stopped rolling, fading along with the music. Blue eyes left green’s, tracing the outlines of pink lips.

“No,” Kara whispered, clearing her throat. “No,” she repeated, firmer. “That’s not what I want,” she said with a slight shake of her head. “I want…” She swallowed, shifting closer, fingers trembling as she lifted her right hand, touching Lena’s cheek just barely. “I want… to practice, and to have all of my firsts with you. If you’re still okay with that. If not, I can go.”

Lena had a feeling twisting inside of her, the thought Kara meant to say something else, though she wasn’t sure what exactly. She knew she had an out, the chance to put a stop to their arrangement before they went further, but this was Kara, and when Kara looked at her with those puppy eyes of her, she couldn’t help but be putty in her hands. It was impossible to deny Kara a request when it meant so much to Kara.

“You don’t have to leave,” Lena replied finally, the pressure on her chest heavy. Each breath she took felt as if her ribs were going to crack. It ached, and she could do nothing to soothe the feeling. “I’m not breaking off our arrangement. It would take more than you kissing me as if you had extra spinach to eat today for me to end what we have.”

Kara’s eyes widened momentarily, returning to their standard size almost immediately.

“The arrangement we have,” Lena added, mentally slapping herself for her poor choice of words.

“I do like spinach,” Kara revealed, smiling when Lena chuckled. “Could we, ah…,” she trailed off, eyes glancing suspiciously at the direction of Lena’s room.

If Lena had taken a sip from her water, she would have choked on it. “Slow,” she reminded Kara, nodding her agreement.

Kara surged forward, claiming Lena’s lips as she pushed her down on the couch. There was nothing slow about it, but Lena couldn’t be bothered to care. It was hot when Kara took some initiative.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Lena’s fingers twisted into Kara’s shirt as they made their way into her bedroom. She let go for a moment in favor of shutting her door, and to ensure they wouldn’t be disturbed, she locked it, though she didn’t expect Kara and her to have sex tonight, not yet. The way she felt it, they both needed a bit more time. There was no rush, not in her eyes, although it was becoming increasingly more tempting to devour Kara.

Kara fisted Lena’s shirt, lips eager as she kissed her. “Can I?” she asked, whimpering while her eyes raked down Lena’s body, grip tightening.

Lena tipped her head forward, stealing a quick kiss before nodding. She raised her arms, breaths shallow as Kara rid her of her shirt. A couple of seconds later, Kara’s landed on top of hers on the floor.

“You’re good at kissing,” Lena whispered, sliding one strap of Kara’s bra down her shoulder. “Really good,” she punctuated, pressing her lips to Kara’s exposed skin.

Kara’s cheeks reddened. “It means a lot to me you think so,” she replied, gasping when Lena littered her neck with open-mouthed kisses. “Y-your opinion… oh, is… mhmm, va-valuable,” she said in between breaths.

Lena brought her lips closer to Kara’s jaw. She knew Kara said it because Kara thought she was very experienced, but she wished Kara had a different reason behind her words. Then again, when it came to kissing, she did kiss a fair share of girls.

Lena pushed the other strap of Kara’s bra down as well, daring to kiss a path from her neck to her collarbones, close to the valley of her breasts.

“Wait,” Kara voiced, running a hand through her hair, smoothing it over as Lena took a step back. “Can I… would it be okay if I tried that…? On… on you, I mean.”

Lena’s smile was instant. “Of course,” she answered, eyes darkening at the mere thought of Kara copying her motions.

Kara hooked her index fingers underneath the straps of Lena’s bra, tugging Lena close. She kissed Lena, languid and slow as she moved her hands up, resting her palms on Lena’s shoulders. When their kiss progressed, her hands caressed down Lena’s arms, leaving goosebumps in their wake.

Lena’s breath came out in a shudder the moment Kara stepped back. “Kara,” she said, almost pleadingly so, inhaling shakily as Kara slid one of her straps down. “You’re a quick learner,” she praised. “What you did…”

Kara’s big blue eyes blinked at Lena, pausing as she bit her lip, tilting her head, waiting for Lena to go on.

“It was hot, pulling me close like that,” Lena complimented, heart racing at the way her words made Kara smile.

With a new boost of confidence, Kara proceeded to mimic what Lena did to her. She brought her lips close to Lena’s right shoulder while her fingers toyed with the strap on her left.

Every kiss ran through Lena’s body like an electric current, shooting all the way down to her core. The next moment felt as if she stepped right into one of her fantasies. More clothes wound up on the floor until Kara, and she stumbled into her bed, wearing nothing but their underwear.

Lena was on top of Kara, groaning into their kiss, feeling her boobs press softly against Kara’s. She leaned away, bracketing Kara’s hips with her thighs. “You’re a beautiful girl,” she said, dragging her eyes up Kara’s body, smiling as their eyes met.

In case Lena became too mushy or touchy-feely, she could pass it off as her words and actions being based on her hormones rather than the way she felt about Kara. If she thought about it, she never got over her crush on Kara. She once humored herself with the idea she did, but it was a blatant lie. And now she had to deal with falling in love with someone who was unattainable.

Kara was a blue rose, beautiful and rare, hardly within her grasp. Even while being right here with Lena, she knew Kara wasn’t hers to hold, hers to cherish, and to love. She didn’t want to think about letting go someday, but Lena knew if she didn’t, she would cut her hand on the thorns.

“Lena?”

Kara’s voice brought Lena back to the present. Her heart gave a pang, seeing Kara look at her in such an open, caring way as if her eyes alone were going to take away every ounce of pain Lena ever felt.

“What’s on your mind?” Kara questioned, lifting her hands, palms up, fingers spread.

Lena smiled faintly, vaguely recalling she said no hand holding, but Kara was such a sweet gem, and it was easy to pretend she never voiced the rules she did. “It’s nothing, really,” she answered, not ready to expose herself enough to open up, though she did lace her fingers with Kara’s, and gave her hands a squeeze.

Kara drew Lena’s right hand close, kissing the back of it, and then did the same with Lena’s left. Her cheeks tinged red, in particular when Lena raised a brow at her.

“You’re cute,” the words escaped Lena before she could stop them.

“Shhh, stop it!” Kara giggled, averting her eyes, turning her face to the side, hiding one cheek into the pillow.

Lena chuckled, and god, her heart just might combust due to how precious Kara was. She leaned down, bringing her lips to Kara’s ear. “Cute, cute, cute,” she teased.

“You’re so in for it, Lena!”

Kara stayed true to her words. She pulled Lena into her, trapped her with her legs, and rolled over, pinning Lena beneath her. Her mouth was quick and precise as she kissed Lena breathless. And she didn’t stop there.

“K-Kara,” Lena choked out, mid-gasp, feeling Kara’s tongue trace around one of her nipple piercings. It was bold, hot, sexy, a major turn on, and she had no doubt she was soaking wet because what Kara did to her was criminally good.

Lena was still catching her breath when Kara kissed her. It was a brief, fleeting moment, which passed by all too fast, though her lungs were grateful for the break.

Kara slowed down and shifted until she was next to Lena. She curled into Lena’s side, nuzzling her head onto Lena’s shoulder.

It was silent for a beat. Lena’s hand came up to card her fingers through Kara’s hair, adoring the way it made Kara hum ever so quietly.

“Lena?” Kara whispered, cutting through the silence.

“Mhmm?”

Kara traced the tip of her finger over the skin of Lena’s stomach in the shape of a sideways eight. “Do you think I’m attractive?” she asked, voice carrying uncertainty as it wavered strong enough for Lena to notice.

 _Did she ever_ , god, Kara was super attractive. There was no doubt in Lena’s mind about that.

“Yes, I think so,” Lena answered, turning her head to the side, ghosting her lips so close to Kara’s she could almost taste them. “You’re easily one of the most attractive girls I’ve ever laid eyes upon,” she added, and perhaps it was too blunt, but it was the truth.

Kara closed the small gap, tangling a hand into Lena’s hair as she did so.

It was crazy to think Kara could believe for even a second she wasn’t desirable when her beauty was ethereal. Lena kissed Kara back, melting completely into everything that was Kara, losing track of time.

“Golly!” Kara shrieked when a door slammed nearby.

Lena sighed as her make-out session with Kara was rudely interrupted, assuming Leslie came home. Reality sunk in when Kara scrambled to put her clothes on. It was Sunday night, and they both had to get up early in the morning. Fuck.

Kara checked her phone and let out a squeak. “It’s past midnight,” she informed Lena with a grimace. “I’ll text you,” she whispered, leaning down to kiss Lena.

It wasn’t the first time Kara kissed Lena before heading out, but it surprised her just as much. She frowned while Kara sprinted away, wondering why Leslie came back this late.

“Hey, blondie,” Lena heard Leslie say. “Doing the walk of shame at night? That’s usually done in the morning, y’know?”

Okay, Lena was going to kill her best friend.

 

 

* * *

 

 

“We should grab a bite to eat at the diner across the street,” Leslie suggested, sliding her arms into her leather jacket. “I’m buying.”

Lena gestured at the ingredients she literally just put onto the table to start preparing something. “Okay, fine,” she relented when Leslie shrugged.

On her way toward the diner with Leslie, Lena remembered Siobhan and how they flirted when she went there with Sam. So far she had done nothing at all with the phone number she was given, although only two days went by since that night, and she never said anything about calling or texting. Neither had Siobhan, so she figured it was an open invitation toward a possible date.

“Hey,” Leslie said with a nod the second they entered. “Table for two,” she added with a cheeky smile.

Siobhan gave a light chuckle, stepping out from behind the bar. “Idiot,” she voiced with a roll of her eyes. There was a fondness in her tone, and the way she smiled at Leslie appeared genuine. “You can sit there,” she suggested, head bobbing toward the table near the window.

Lena didn’t know what to say when Siobhan glanced at her for a moment. It was the same table where she sat with Sam during the weekend, and she doubted that was a coincidence. She didn’t know Leslie knew Siobhan, and they had to know each other or else her best friend would have punched the bartender for calling her an idiot.

“Need me to pull your chair back too while I’m at it?” Siobhan commented, grinning at Leslie.

Leslie shrugged a shoulder. “Might as well,” she replied, sparing a smile when Siobhan gave her shoulder a light push. “The customers comes first and all that.”

Siobhan, much to Lena’s surprise, did pull a chair back for Leslie. “You would,” she said, squeezing Leslie’s shoulder.

Lena silently sat down across from Leslie, voicing little aside from her order. Once the bartender left, she noticed how her best friend’s demeanor slipped back into a somber one, the same one she saw on her face this morning.

“Cards onto the table,” Lena began, waiting for a beat for Leslie to look at her. “Are you okay? And don’t give me some bullshit answer. I’m worried about you. When I saw you leave with that bottle of vodka… I should have stopped you.”

Leslie released an audible sigh. “I didn’t empty that bottle by myself, just for the record,” she replied, not that it made Lena any less concerned.

“Talk to me?”

“You were wrong about little Lane and me. I was only sleeping with her because…when you want to get over someone, you get under someone else, that kind of deal.”

Lena had no idea Leslie liked someone. She was so sure her best friend had a thing for Lucy Lane, but apparently, she had it all wrong.

“Don’t get me wrong,” Leslie continued hurriedly. “Luce is fun and all that, and sure I like her, but I don’t like-like her. I can see her being my friend, but that’s it. I’ve had a long talk with her, and she gets it. She’s cool about it, more than I expected her to be. I mean, she was a little bummed at first, but she understands I’m hung up on someone else.”

Lena opened her mouth to say something.

“Anyways,” Leslie said with a shrug of her shoulder, beating Lena to the punch. “What’s up with you?”

Lena knew her best friend well enough to understand she didn’t want to talk about it anymore. Once something was off the table, there was no point in trying to bring it back on. “I don’t have a crush on Kara Danvers,” she stated in earnest.

Leslie sighed and rested her chin in the palm of her hand. “That bad, hm?”

Lena confirmed what she knew Leslie could tell already. “I’m falling in love with her.”

 


	7. Chapter 7

Lena entered room B206 for her AP chemistry class. The professor was nowhere to be seen yet, even though the course began in five minutes. Then again, Professor Marsh had a reputation of being notoriously late.

Girls glanced at Lena while she made her way to the back of the class, even a few guys tried to catch her eye. She would have preferred a seat in the front, but others needed it more than she did to pay close attention. Chemistry was one of those courses she considered to be a walk in the park.

Lena heard hushed conversations as she sat down. Her peers weren’t subtle enough with their curious gazes and with the way they kept dropping her name in their discussions. Last time they whispered whether she stopped dating girls, but this time it was much worse. She curled her fingers around her pen, almost snapping it in half as they gossiped how she was seen leaving the room of a senior.

Of course, why would Lena ever think they wouldn’t talk about that? The people going to school here were invasive as fuck, and it didn’t surprise her she was caught exiting Sam’s room. Nothing happened, but voicing that truth would be like talking to a wall.

And so, another rumor spread, of how Lena was into older women, and how she was a home wrecker. As far as she was concerned, they could all go fuck themselves. The sickening part was how some girls had the audacity to give her heart eyes, romanticizing what they thought she did.

“Is this seat taken?”    

Lena dropped her pen. “Imra, hello,” she said, smiling up at the girl with the gorgeous accent. Her eyes drifted briefly toward the seat next to her. “No, it’s not,” she answered, gesturing at it, surprised Imra didn’t choose to sit at the front row as usual, or in the middle at least.

“I have a feeling Professor Marsh will be delayed for another five minutes, give or take.”

Lena raised a brow. “What makes you think that?”

“I’d like to say it’s just a hunch, but alas, when I left Starbucks, she was in line to get some coffee.”

“Someone ought to buy that woman a decent watch,” Lena mused, sharing a smile with Imra. “Though if I’m being fair, I don’t think I’d be able to function if I don’t start my morning with a cup of coffee,” she said, on second thought. “I’d miss a couple minutes of class for that any day.”

“I’m more of a tea-drinker myself, but when you take care of a friend with a hangover and stay up half the night, something stronger is required.”

“I hope your friend is okay,” Lena replied with a frown.

Imra took out a notepad and a pencil, sketching while everyone waited for the professor to arrive. A few latecomers made a quick dash into the classroom, rushing to get a seat as if a quarter of them being free wasn’t enough to choose from.

Lena snorted when she saw Imra draw flowers. “Typical,” she whispered, trying to cover up what she said with a sigh, glancing away as Imra looked at her. “So, you sketch?”

“I dabble,” Imra answered, moving her pencil in smooth motions over her paper.

Lena chanced another peek. “I’d call that more than dabble,” she appraised, admiring the eye for detail Imra put into her drawing, how it looked as if the flower could be taken right out of the page. “My best friend draws, too. She likes to draw tattoo designs.”

“Leslie,” Imra said with a strained smile. “I’m aware.”

Lena frowned at the bitterness in Imra’s voice, but if she put two and two together, she could take a rough guess who Imra’s friend was. It was possible Lucy didn’t stop after that bottle of vodka Leslie shared with her two days ago. She decided not to question Imra about any of that.

“What would you do if someone asked you out and you weren’t interested?” Imra questioned out of the blue. “Turning people down feels insurmountable to me. I hate hurting people’s feelings, so I’m never sure what to say to let them down gently.”

Lena didn’t see herself as a fit candidate to give advice when it came down to that. “I’d say no. I’m not interested in dating because I’m not emotionally available anyway. Not that it’s anyone’s business,” she murmured, missing the way Imra went still next to her, too engrossed tuning in to chemistry as their professor finally walked into the classroom.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Lena stared at the clock. It was a quarter to eight and Leslie left to give her some privacy. She told her best friend it wasn’t necessary, but Leslie insisted, and on the bright side she didn’t take any alcohol with her, though that wasn’t to say Leslie wouldn’t get some elsewhere.

It confused Lena how secretive her best friend was about the girl she was trying to get over. Not that Leslie had to share every little detail, although usually they talked about everything, and shared whatever was on their mind. She knew her friend didn’t like things that were too emotional, so she assumed Leslie had a good reason for choosing to be vague about the matter.

Lena watched as the time ticked away. It was Friday night, and Kara was about to come over. She received a text from her the other day, asking if she was free, which of course, she was. Her only plans consisted of studying, which she could do for the remainder of the weekend. The difference this time was how Kara requested to talk. She couldn’t stop thinking about what Kara meant, couldn’t ignore the strange feeling in her gut.

“Fuck it,” Lena sighed, peeling her eyes away from the clock before she drove herself mad.

Lena realized she barely ate anything since lunch. She wasn’t particularly hungry, though she wasn’t keen on skipping a meal altogether either. With ten minutes left on the clock, she opened the refrigerator, groaning when she noticed it was close to empty.

There were apples shoved in the bottom with a few pears – god, she lost count of how many times she told Leslie they had a fruit bowl, not that her best friend listened much, considering Leslie was a free spirit – some cheese, cans filled with soda, and some leftover bacon with eggs Leslie must have put in there.

Lena reached for an apple, making a mental note to get some groceries soon. Her other hand opened the drawer, grabbing a knife. She rinsed her fruit under the sink, eyes flickering toward that damned clock again while she tried to cut her apple. Maybe if Kara didn’t eat much yet, she could order something for them to share; a pizza perhaps.

But there was no saying how long Kara would stay. For all Lena knew, Kara was only coming over for five minutes, maybe to tell her she wanted to call off their arrangement. She hoped that wasn’t it, but if it were, then she would respect Kara’s decision. If Kara heard the latest rumor, the one involving Sam, she really wished Kara didn’t believe it because nothing happened.

A gasp escaped Lena’s lips when she felt a flash of pain slice through the palm of her hand, quite literally. “Fuck!” she cursed aloud, hissing as she studied the cut in her skin, letting the slightly bloodied knife clatter onto the counter.

“Dammit,” Lena muttered, turning the faucet on again to wash off the blood, which pulsed from the open wound.

The cut ran sideways across her palm, and it wasn’t shallow, but with some luck, she wouldn’t need any stitches. Lena couldn’t believe she was too distracted checking the clock that she failed to notice how much the knife slipped. It was stupid to slice fruit without looking. She knew she should have known better.

“Good thing it’s my left hand and not my right,” Lena whispered with a bittersweet chuckle. If it were her dominant hand, it would have been worse. She had no doubt she was going to feel that cut for a couple of days.

There was a series of knocks on the door. Lena sighed at the knife with the bit of blood she still had to clean up, the cut in her hand, and her abandoned apple lying there in the sink. According to the clock, she had a little over five minutes left, but Kara seemed hell-bent on making up for how late she was the first time she came over.

“I’m coming!” Lena shouted, turning off the faucet, grasping a towel, wrapping it around her hand. “Yes, I’m here!” she called out when the knocks sounded again. _Geez, impatient much?_

Lena bit her tongue to keep from saying those words aloud. She wasn’t frustrated at Kara, only at herself. In her haste to open the door, she stumbled over her feet, but she caught herself reaching for the table.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Lena hissed under her breath. “I swear this day hates me.”

Righting herself and taking a deep breath first, and a second… and a third, Lena opened the door.

Kara’s face was awash with pain. Her eyes were glassy as if she was on the verge of tears. She had black rims around her eyes, indicating she hadn’t been getting enough sleep lately. It was a different sight from how she was usually refreshed, all smiles, and pure sunshine. A split second later, Kara’s demeanor changed, and she rushed inside like a bolt of lightning, mumbling a rushed _‘hi.’_

Lena’s eyebrows went up to her hairline. “Okay…,” she trailed off, shutting the door while she wondered why Kara couldn’t seem to enter fast enough.

“Something on fire?” Lena asked when her curiosity bested her, though she kept her tone light and joking.

Kara chuckled briefly, shaking her head. “I thought I saw my sis…” Her jaw dropped when her eyes fell to Lena’s left hand. “Golly, Lena! What happened?” she demanded, eyes wide as she surged forward, wrapping her fingers around Lena’s wrist.

“Oh, it’s nothing,” Lena went to say, wincing when Kara revealed the cut in the palm of her hand. “It was a clumsy accident. You wanted to talk?”

“I- no,” Kara mumbled, averting her eyes for a beat, clenching her jaw. The vein on the side of her neck twitched. “Do you have a medical kit?” she asked, voice all seriousness.

“Yes, in the cabinet in the bathroom,” Lena answered, and she would have probably fetched that by now if Kara hadn’t arrived early.

Kara nodded. “Sit down,” she said while she strutted over to the bathroom.

Lena was a little perplexed, but she obeyed nonetheless, taking a seat. She rested her hand on the table while her eyes followed Kara. “I didn’t know you were studying to become a doctor,” she teased the second Kara returned, smiling as Kara set everything down.

Kara huffed. “I know a few things,” she said, pulling a chair close to Lena. “Give me your hand.”

“Bossy,” Lena noted. “I like it,” she added, holding her hand out to Kara.

Kara cleaned the cut and scrutinized it, humming faintly. “I don’t think you’ll need stitches,” she concluded with a deeply relieved sigh. Her eyes darted around the room, stilling when they landed on the knife atop the counter. “What… what were you, ah, doing… with that?” she inquired, and just like that, her voice sounded unsure, wavering here and there.

Lena tilted her head to the side. Something about Kara’s behavior gave her the feeling Kara thought she hurt herself on purpose, which was far from the truth. “I tried to cut an apple. The knife slipped,” she informed Kara, matter-of-factly.

Kara gave Lena a barely-there smile. “I’m clumsy sometimes, too,” she revealed, starting on bandaging Lena’s hand. “Alex taught me most of the medical stuff I know. Eliza taught me a thing or two as well.”

“Who is Eliza?” Lena asked before she could stop herself. “You don’t have to answer that,” she rushed out to say when the light in Kara’s eyes dimmed in a barely noticeable way, but she was sitting too close not to see. “It’s not any of my business.”

“No, it’s… it’s fine,” Kara replied, continuing to apply the bandage. “Eliza is my adoptive mother. I lost my parents when I was ten, while I was at summer camp. It was a long time ago.”

“I lost my biological parents, too,” Lena shared. “So Alex is your…?”

“Adoptive sister,” Kara confirmed with a nod. “But we’re close, even though at first we hated each other’s guts,” she explained with a fond smile. “Alex suddenly had to share her room with me, and she was going through puberty. I had a lot of anger inside of me at first because I didn’t want to live there. It got easier with time. Alex and I are pretty much inseparable now. We share a dorm.”

Lena could listen to Kara talk on and on, she didn’t mind. It was nice to learn more about the girl who made her want to smile more than she usually did.

Kara finished up bandaging Lena’s hand. “There,” she whispered, pressing a kiss to it with a smile. “So it’ll heal faster,” she said, cheeks tinted red.

Lena gazed deeply into Kara’s eyes, seeing little specks of yellow in those blue eyes which made her feel as if she was walking on air and flying at the same time. They were only a few inches apart. Her right hand slid into Kara’s hair, finding purchase there while she drew Kara into a kiss.

It was the spur of the moment, an impulse because Kara was sweet and caring. When Lena’s lips touched Kara’s, it struck her what she did, how she initiated a kiss which couldn’t be excused as helping Kara with her firsts. She backed away, an apology ready on the tip of her tongue, but then Kara leaned in, connecting their mouths, crumbling her resolve.

Lena kissed back, moaning a little when she felt Kara’s tongue caress her lips. Kara’s hand made contact with nothing more than her cheek, yet it felt as if Kara touched her everywhere at once, even in her veins.

They broke apart with matching smiles, closing the gap again, letting their kiss deepen.

Lena moved her hand down Kara’s back, ignoring the small ache as her bandaged hand fisted Kara’s shirt to bring her closer to her. She tasted remnants of pizza as her tongue circled around Kara’s, which reminded her she ought to get a bite to eat.

“Wow…,” Kara breathed out, licking her lips. “Should we take this to your bedroom?” she asked, cheeks reddening immediately, ducking her head.

Lena smiled and cupped Kara’s jaw with her good hand. “Soon,” she promised, running her thumb across Kara’s kiss-swollen lips. “I was thinking about some food and a movie first if you’re interested?”

“I’m always interested in food.”

“I’ll take that as a yes,” Lena replied, smiling when Kara smiled at her. “I need five minutes to order some food and to clean up a little. Feel free to make yourself comfortable,” she said, nodding her head toward the couch.

Kara got up and placed her hands on her hips. God, that stance looked powerful and made Lena want to kiss her all over again. “How about you order the food and I’ll clean up?”

“Don’t be ridiculous, Kara, you’re my guest.”

“Your hand is injured,” Kara pointed out. “Don’t be a stubborn ass, let me help.”

Lena guffawed. “Did you just call me an ass?” she asked, lips bordering on a smile, and she had to admit she was somewhat stubborn at times.

“Nope!” Kara squeaked, wheeling around on the ball of her foot. “I have no idea what makes you think I did,” she said, voice so high-pitched, Lena couldn’t help but laugh.

Lena shook her head smiling. “Dork,” she whispered, approaching Kara. She snaked her arms around Kara’s waist from behind, placing her chin on her shoulder. “Dork,” she repeated, turning her face to the side to kiss Kara’s cheek.

Kara covered Lena’s hands with hers. “If you distract me like that, we’ll be bandaging my hand next,” she said with a chuckle, ogling the knife she was about to clean.

“I would let go if someone didn’t seem so reluctant about letting me,” Lena quipped, tugging for good measurement, to remind Kara where her hands were.

Kara blushed even harder at that. “My bad,” she admitted, letting go of Lena’s hands so Lena could step back.

Lena found herself missing the contact, and when she heard Kara sigh while those blue eyes briefly sought out her green’s, she hoped that maybe – if there was even the slightest sliver of possibility Kara remotely liked her – Kara missed it, too.

 


	8. Chapter 8

Kara helped herself to the last slice of pizza after Lena assured her two times she could have it because Lena had enough. Smidges of tomato sauce decorated her cheeks and chin as she stuffed the food into her mouth in big bites, almost as if she tried to inhale it without actually chewing.

Lena never thought she would find an appreciation for messy eaters, but something about the way Kara happily devoured the pizza wrenched a smile free, and it was oddly endearing. It was always a toss-up with quirks, whether they would be annoying or tolerable, although she was probably somewhat biased due to her attraction toward Kara.

“Mhmm,” Kara hummed, licking her lips. “That was delicious, thanks,” she said with a broad smile. “Next time I’m paying.”

“Of course,” Lena replied, although that was debatable. “Next time,” she repeated in a whisper, feeling her heart skip a beat at the thought they would get to do this again sometime in the near future. She knew it wasn’t set in stone, but it gave her a spark of hope nonetheless.

“I’m surprised you… have such a healthy appetite,” Lena stated carefully, watching Kara intently to ensure she didn’t hurt her feelings or offend her. It honestly didn’t matter to her how much Kara ate, and it certainly wasn’t an insult.

“I try to work out as much as I can, so I burn a lot,” Kara explained, flexing her arms. “See?”

Lena choked on her own spit. She tried to mask it with a quick cough, failing miserably, eyes watery as she nodded. God, Kara’s chuckle made it even more embarrassing she couldn’t control her gay just because a pretty girl flexed.

Kara shifted closer. “Are you okay?” she asked with a knowing smile, placing a hand on Lena’s shoulder.

Lena saw how Kara’s eyes flit down to her lips and how her amused smile dissipated as Kara leaned in just a few inches, not close enough for a kiss yet, but if she met Kara halfway, it would be. She had a feeling Kara enjoyed practicing, which she could relate to because kissing Kara felt like heaven on earth.

Kara dropped her hand, rolling her lips into her mouth as she leaned back, breaking the trance both of them were in. “How, uh,” she said, gesturing vaguely at Lena, clearing her throat. “How does your hand feel?”

Lena almost forgot about her clumsy accident. “It stings a bit,” she answered, glancing down at her bandaged hand. “Maybe another kiss might help,” she suggested, but before she could hold out her hand, Kara closed the gap between them all at once, locking their lips.

Lena let out a muffled moan, more surprised than anything when Kara really went for it, licking into her mouth. She opened up beneath her as Kara pushed her down on the couch. Her tongue danced around Kara’s, and she could get used to doing this often, the more, the better.

By the time Kara backed away to catch her breath, Lena chuckled. “That wasn’t the kind of kiss I was talking about, but I wouldn’t mind if you do that again,” she breathed out, perhaps a tad too honest, but she couldn’t help the way her heart bled for Kara, how she was falling for the one girl who was supposed to be her friend.

Kara's cheeks colored red, which was another thing Lena wanted more of because she liked having an effect on Kara. Her heart did funny things each time she made Kara blush or smile or laugh, and she swore it was going to combust someday.

“I know that wasn’t what you meant,” Kara sighed, brushing a lock of Lena’s hair behind her ear. “But I…,” she bit her tongue, shook her head, and smiled. Her gaze met Lena’s while both of them leaned in, inch by inch. “I… wanted to,” she confessed, pecking Lena’s lips.

“To practice,” Lena filled in, feeling her heart crack a little at saying those words, but she figured it was easier if she voiced them instead of hearing Kara say them.

Kara chewed her lip. A beat passed before she nodded, mumbling, “Practice.”

“But what if,” Kara blurted out, only to fall silent and avert her eyes.

Lena cupped Kara’s cheek. “What if?” she inquired, searching Kara’s eyes for a spark of hope she could hold on to, hope that maybe it wasn’t all about practice.

Something in Kara’s eyes dulled. The light in them was less bright, and her smile appeared almost pained. “It’s nothing really,” she answered with a dry chuckle, though the brief hitch in her voice claimed the opposite.

Lena wanted to press on, but she let it slide instead. If Kara wanted her to know, she would have told her.

Kara ran a hand through her hair, gaze flickering toward Lena’s bedroom. She blushed when Lena caught her looking. “What, ah, kind of music do you have?” she asked, twirling a lock of her hair around her index finger.

A smile tugged at Lena’s lips, recalling the time she was rummaging through her cd’s in her room, and how Kara caught her off guard with a kiss. “I can show you if you’d like,” she offered, getting up, holding out her hand to Kara.

Kara’s hand was warm when she placed it in Lena’s. Also slightly clammy, but it didn’t matter.

Lena forgot about her rule of no holding hands until she was in front of her bedroom door. Assuming from how quickly Kara accepted her outstretched hand, she had a feeling she wasn’t the only one.

The door was barely closed when Kara and Lena began to make out, kissing each other as if it was the last thing they would ever do. Kara’s fingers were quick and eager as she tried to rid Lena of her clothes. Something about her attitude and how she tried to dominate the kiss screamed _‘let’s get this over with.’_

Lena didn’t want to read too much into it, but it didn’t sit well with her how Kara appeared in a rush, so she kissed Kara slower, silently urging her to take it easy, relieved when Kara took it down a notch.

Kara took a step back, panting. “Golly, what was I thinking?” she muttered, burying her hands in her hair. “Your hand…,” she trailed off, gesturing at Lena’s bandaged hand. “It’s obviously not a good time for you tonight. Not that I’m saying you’re any less good in bed just because you can’t use your left hand, but we should probably postpone this a little. You’re injured. I shouldn’t have acted in such a selfish way.”

Lena hoped her cheeks weren’t too red. She knew sex was a part of the arrangement she had with Kara, but if she was honest, tonight didn’t feel like the right time, regardless of her injured hand. It was somewhat endearing how Kara continued to ramble on while she paced around. She was confused why Kara was so eager all of a sudden to get it over with when there was no time limit, really.

“Are you done?” Lena asked with a chuckle when Kara stopped rambling to catch her breath. “You’re adorable, come here,” she said, opening her arms for a hug, and god the moment Kara wrapped her arms around her, she knew she was beyond screwed.

Kara tightened her grip, hands clutching Lena’s shirt like an anchor. “Don’t let go too soon,” she whispered, nuzzling her head in the crook of Lena’s neck.

Lena’s heart felt as if thorns curled around it, and it stung, but she couldn’t let her feelings ruin this moment. The way Kara clung to her simultaneously worsened and lessened the pain. Every touch, every gaze, and each smile was engraved into her memories, captured there, puzzled together like a collage.

“I won’t,” Lena assured Kara, pressing a kiss to the crown of her head. “I won’t let go,” she hushed soothingly, combing her fingers through Kara’s locks while her other hand rested at the small of Kara’s back.

If only Kara knew the depth of Lena’s words, how true they rang, how she didn’t want to let go at all.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Leslie paused in the threshold. Her eyes narrowed, zeroing in on Lena. “The fuck happened to your hand?” she asked, frowning while she took in the bandage.

Lena sighed. “I got distracted while slicing an apple, or trying to, at least,” she answered, not intending to wear the bandage for long, mainly because it itched, and the cut wasn’t that deep, really.

Leslie snorted. “Gay panic got you that bad?” she commented, making a grab for Lena’s hand, turning it over, inspecting the bandage. “Hmm not bad,” she hummed. “You apply this yourself?”

“No, and I wasn’t having a gay panic,” Lena corrected with a roll of her eyes. “Where the hell have you been all night anyway?” she asked, to shift the topic, but also because she was up half the night, texting Leslie only to receive precisely zero responses, which worried her to no end.

Leslie shrugged a shoulder and stepped away. “I told you I was giving you privacy, so there you go,” she mumbled, grabbing a can of soda from the refrigerator. “You’re welcome by the way,” she said, opening her drink, taking a large gulp. “You wanna get some breakfast at the diner?”

Nothing happened, but Lena didn’t need to give Leslie any details whatsoever. “It’s almost noon,” she pointed out. That, and she already had a quick bite to eat for breakfast, for as far as a slice of bread and an apple counted as a meal.

“Lunch then, whatever,” Leslie grumbled, crushing the can with one hand the second she finished emptying it, tossing it at the garbage bin.

Lena sighed quietly. “Very well then,” she relented, not wanting to test Leslie when she wasn’t in a good mood. “I’ll pay.”

“Works for me,” Leslie agreed, stalking over to the door, yanking it open. “I never mind saving a couple bucks.”

Several minutes later, Leslie and Lena crossed the street, entering the diner. Half of the tables were occupied, but the one near the window where Lena liked to sit was still empty. A few curious gazes glanced their way, and a girl who once stumbled out of Leslie’s bedroom shot them a wink.

“If it isn’t my favorite idiot,” Siobhan mused, smiling from ear to ear as she walked up to Leslie and Lena, just as they took their seats. “And hello to you, too,” she added, sparing Lena a quick look.

“Favorite, hm?” Leslie replied, leaning against the window, draping her arm over the back of the chair. “Am I supposed to live with that?”

Siobhan took out her notepad. “If you can’t, you could always die,” she suggested, clicking her pen. “Though that would be depressing and I might even shed a tear.”

“Please, you’d be bawling your eyes out without me.”

“I might even scream,” Siobhan revealed.

Leslie moved her lips from left to right. “Not the kind of scream I enjoy hearing, but I’ll take it,” she said with a small sigh.

Siobhan chuckled. “You’d have to work harder for the other one,” she replied, tapping her pen against her notepad. “So, what can I get you?”

Lena was surprised when Siobhan looked at her because she could have sworn Siobhan and Leslie forgot she was even there. The way she saw it, they interacted as if they were the only two people at this diner, not that it was a bad thing.

Siobhan must have caught Lena ogling. “We’re often like this,” she informed Lena with a smile, ruffling Leslie’s hair, laughing when Leslie slapped her hand away. “Leslie is like a sister or something to me.”

“Yeah,” Leslie chimed in, smile a little tight, pausing a beat. “Sisters,” she confirmed, shoving Siobhan with a grin. “Go get our order, lazy ass. I’ll have my usual, and she’ll have the same.”

Lena never agreed to eat the same as Leslie, and she wasn’t too fond of people ordering for her, but overall her best friend’s taste in food at this diner wasn’t awful, so she let it slide.

“Ever the impatient one,” Siobhan muttered, grinning as she turned around.

Lena watched Siobhan slip behind the counter and slowly brought her eyes back to Leslie, taking notice of the deep frown which had settled on her face. There was a mild grimace present, which didn’t sit well with her. Something about the interaction between her best friend and Siobhan had felt off to her, felt as if there was more to it, especially due to how Leslie hesitated before she agreed with Siobhan.

“Stop looking at me like that,” Leslie muttered, sighing audibly. “I know what you’re thinking.”

Lena tried to busy herself with glancing around, but she was too distracted worrying about her best friend. “It’s her, isn’t it?” she half-asked, half-stated while Leslie shrugged.

“We’re both flirts,” Leslie said, letting out another sigh as she rested her chin in the palm of her hand, eyes fixated on the direction of the bar. “I met her when I was fifteen. She knew I used a fake id to get inside this club, and I knew she used one too cuz you had to be twenty-one to enter. She’s got a couple years on us, not that much. Siobhan and I ditched that place to have some fun. Innocent stuff, nothing sexual or anything. I’ve had a mad crush on her since, but I know she’d never be into me cuz she sees me as family.”

Lena decided not to do anything with the number Siobhan gave her, not that she planned to anyway. “I take it she doesn’t know how you feel.”

“Fuck no,” Leslie scoffed. “I ain’t gonna tell her. I’ll get over her. I just need more time or something. Fuck, I don’t know,” she grumbled, running a hand through her hair. “What’s up with you and blondie? You feeling nervous?”

“You can always talk to me. I’m here,” Lena reminded her best friend. “How about we go someplace tonight, just you and me? We can pretend to get drunk on cheap beer, earn some money with poker together, and make others cry for thinking they stood a chance.”

Leslie’s lips curled into a genuine smile. “We sure are good as fuck at poker,” she agreed. “Yeah, I’m down for that.

Siobhan returned to the table with two plates filled with pasta. “It’s on the house,” she prompted before Lena could even begin to reach for her wallet. “I can’t let my favorite pay,” she added with a wink toward Leslie.

Leslie narrowed her eyes when Siobhan stepped closer. “If you ruffle my hair again, I’ll break your hand,” she warned in a low grumble.

Siobhan pinched Leslie’s cheek instead, chuckling when Leslie tried to bite her hand. “You sure are hungry,” she commented, taking a step back. “I’ll be back with drinks. Good thing vodka and water look the same.”

“Yeah,” Leslie sighed while Siobhan left. “So do salt and sugar.”

 

 

* * *

 

 

A month went by before Lena agreed to meet up with Kara again on a Friday night, at seven. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to see Kara sooner, but they both got busy with their schedules, and they had other people in their lives to spend time with. She yearned to kiss Kara again, to taste her lips, and to touch her skin.

Lena gave herself a once-over in the full-length mirror. She opted for black slacks and a checkered navy and black flannel shirt. Until Sunday, she had the place to herself because Leslie was gone for the weekend with Siobhan. She was cautious when her best friend announced Siobhan asked her to hang out so they could go to a saloon somewhere and do some sight-seeing, but Leslie was thrilled about it, so she let her go, hoping for the best.

The cut in Lena’s left hand had healed quite nicely. It was still somewhat visible, though it was fading more with each passing week. With some luck, it wouldn’t scar. The memory was too embarrassing to have it on her skin forever.

“Deep breaths,” Lena told herself, nodding at her reflection. “You got this, follow your gut,” she whispered, repeating the words Leslie said to her numerous times.

Lena smoothed the crinkles in her shirt, taking one last deep breath when she heard the tell-tale knocks on the door. She hoped she wasn’t smiling all goofy as she went to let Kara in, and she suppressed the urge to kiss Kara right off the bat, regardless of how much she wanted to pull her in and kiss her until both of them gasped for air.

“Hey!” Kara beamed with a smile so bright Lena couldn’t help but return it.

“Hello to you, too,” Lena replied, shutting the door behind Kara. “It’s been a hot minute.”

“It has been,” Kara sighed, closing in on Lena, flicking her eyes down to Lena’s lips while she trapped Lena between her body and the door. “Can I kiss you?”

Lena was surprised Kara even asked. “Ple-yes,” she answered, swallowing thickly at almost giving away how eager she was. Or maybe she did by responding quickly. Her thoughts became irrelevant the second Kara’s lips were on hers, luring her into a sweet paradise she wished to reside in forever.

Kara’s hands managed to disappear underneath Lena’s shirt, resting loosely on her sides. “I’m ready to have sex tonight,” she whispered, releasing a ragged breath, ghosting her lips close to Lena’s. “I… I’ll need your guidance, but I’m sure I want this. If that’s, ah, o-okay… with you.”

Lena couldn’t breathe, couldn’t blink, and couldn’t speak while her heart sped up. If she asked herself if she was ready for this, the answer would be yes, but the experience Kara thought she had was nothing more but a hoax. She pondered if she should bite the bullet and tell Kara she was a virgin, wondered if Kara would believe her even if she did decide to tell the truth.

“Lena?” Kara said, voice frail. Her fingers trembled as she went to tuck a lock of Lena’s hair behind her ear, brushing Lena’s cheek before she lowered her hand altogether. “What’s on your mind?”

 


	9. Chapter 9

Lena plastered a smile onto her face. “It’s nothing,” she told Kara after a drawn-out pause. “My mind wanders sometimes,” she shared, which was an understatement, but the truth seemed irrelevant.

Earlier conversations made it clear Kara appeared to believe in the rumor, taking it for truth without question, and Lena wanted Kara to know it wasn’t, though she asked herself if it mattered whether Kara knew or not. It wouldn’t change their arrangement, aside from the fact she had no experience.

“My mind does that, too,” Kara replied with a soft smile. She grasped Lena’s left hand and ran her thumb across her palm. “Almost healed,” she noted, pressing her lips to the fading cut. “You’re beautiful,” she whispered, blushing fiercely.

Lena felt her cheeks heat up. “So are you,” she said in earnest. Her lips parted in a breathless gasp when Kara kissed the palm of her hand again. It was a sweet gesture, causing butterflies to erupt in the pit of her stomach.

“Did you have a bite to eat yet?” Kara questioned, letting go of Lena’s hand. “I still owe you a pizza or something.”

“Truth be told, I did eat,” Lena revealed. “But if you haven’t yet, we could order something.”

“I did, too. I wasn’t sure if you had or not, so I figured I’d ask. Rain check?”

“Sounds good to me,” Lena agreed, although she wondered what was going to happen to her connection with Kara after everything was said and done. She hoped it wouldn’t be awkward for them to remain friends, even if that seemed inevitable, considering she was falling in love with Kara.

“Can I get you something to drink?” Lena asked, wandering over to the refrigerator. “I have water and lemonade.”

Kara peered around, eyes lingering a beat longer on Lena’s bedroom than the rest of the place. She glanced at the clock, chewing her lip.

“Kara?” Lena asked, frowning when Kara’s heard whipped toward her. “You’re not on a curfew, are you?” she checked with a humored chuckle.

“No, no, not at all!” Kara answered, running a hand through her hair, smiling shyly while her cheeks reddened. “I just, it’s, ah, time flies around you, and I wanted to make sure I didn’t somehow blink while an hour or something went by,” she explained, clasping her hands together for a second, placing them on her hips next.

Lena agreed time did fly when they were together. “Water or lemonade?” she questioned, holding a can of lemonade and a bottle of water, wiggling it a bit to make sure Kara noticed this time.

“I’ll have what you’re having.”

“Water it is,” Lena decided, thinking how they generally drank water, and it was much more refreshing anyway.

Lena rummaged through the cupboard, grasping two glasses. “Feel free to make yourself at home,” she offered, pouring their drinks, standing with her back toward Kara.

“Can I give you a hand with those?” Kara asked, suddenly standing right behind Lena.

Lena startled enough to spill some of the water over her fingers. “Jesus, Kara, don’t sneak up on me like that,” she whispered, steadying herself as she turned around, and oh god, that made it worse because now she was nearly nose to nose with Kara.

Kara’s smile had a hint of an apology. “Bad conscience?”

“Hmm?” Lena hummed, thrusting one of the glasses into Kara’s hands.

“It’s a silly thing people say,” Kara brushed off, walking away with her glass in her hands. “I thought that maybe you had something on your mind that made you startle so easily. Golly, what am I saying, I know you have things on your mind. You said before your mind wanders sometimes,” she rambled, pausing to sip from her water. “I’m not making much sense am I?” she sighed.

“I know what you mean,” Lena replied, and maybe having so much on her mind did make her startle quicker than usual. “If hundreds of people told you something about someone and swore by it, but the person in question tells you it’s not true, would you believe them or the pack of sheep?”

“Pack of sheep,” Kara snorted. “Sorry,” she murmured, clearing her throat. “Lena, I… I know.”

Lena swallowed thickly. “You know?” she inquired, taking a seat on the couch with Kara. The only one who knew was her best friend, and there was no way Leslie would have gone behind her back to share something so personal with anyone, let alone Kara.

“I know you didn’t sleep with Sam,” Kara revealed.

“Oh,” Lena whispered because of course, Kara wasn’t talking about her being a virgin. “Did she tell you that?”

Kara shook her head. “She didn’t have to,” she said with a soft sigh and a tender smile. “It doesn’t matter if the whole school would tell me you slept with her. I know it’s a lie because you’re a good person. Everyone thinks you’re mean, but you’re not. You’re really not. You’re sweet and kind. You’re not the kind of person who would try to come between two people who are happy together. Alex jumped to conclusions because the situation looked sketchy, but I know you wouldn’t try anything with someone who’s taken.”

That wasn’t where Lena aimed to take her question, but the fact Kara said those nice things about her warmed her heart. Many others were quick to assume and believe she slept with Sam, even though she didn’t.

“Lena…,” Kara whispered, lips curling down when Lena’s eyes grew watery. “Come here,” she said, setting both of their glasses aside so she could wrap her arms around Lena.

Lena took a shaky breath as she rested her chin on Kara’s shoulder, and maybe Kara would never feel for her what she felt for Kara, but this moment was proof to her Kara did love her, even if it was only as a friend.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Lena ended up watching a movie with Kara, but she couldn’t help but notice how Kara’s eyes kept wandering toward her bedroom. At first, it was once every seven minutes or so, but as the film progressed, the time between each glance lessened. She sincerely doubted Kara even followed what happened on screen.

Her thoughts were confirmed when Lena switched off the television, smiling at how Kara didn’t even blink, utterly unfazed. “Distracted, are we?” she hummed, brushing her fingers through Kara’s hair, enamored as blue eyes bored into hers.

Kara’s cheeks darkened. “I guess I am,” she admitted, briefly daring to stare out into the hall. “Are you thinking what I’m thinking?” she asked, chewing her bottom lip, searching Lena’s eyes.

Lena exhaled softly, adding a content hum. “Do you want to go to my room?” she inquired, cradling Kara’s jaw, running her thumb over Kara’s lips while she slowly began to lean in, observing Kara carefully to gauge her reaction.

Kara’s gaze dropped to Lena’s lips, flicking back up. “Y-yes,” she swallowed audibly, closing the gap between them.

Kara was so close Lena could almost taste her lips. She shuddered at the way Kara’s breath came out in little puffs. Without another moment of hesitation, she pressed her mouth to Kara’s, placing her hands on Kara’s waist.

Kara moaned into the kiss. She wove her fingers into Lena’s hair, nails scraping gently at her scalp with a muffled, “woom.”

Lena got up from the couch and tangled her hand in Kara’s shirt, pulling her up, resuming their heated kiss as they moved toward her bedroom.

The door clicked shut when Lena gave it a kick. Clothes wound up haphazardly onto the floor, all of them, except their underwear. Kara stumbled onto the bed first, eyes raking down Lena’s body with a carnal hunger, licking her lips in a predator-like fashion.

Lena felt a spark of electricity course through her body, seeing how Kara ate her with a single look. “Give me one minute,” she near pleaded, leaning down to press a chaste kiss to Kara’s lips.

Kara scrambled toward the head of the bed, sitting down against it with a mild frown on her face. “Is everything okay?” she asked, folding her arms one second, uncrossing them the next.

Lena didn’t mean to make Kara think something was wrong. She nodded as she gathered a bunch of candles she saved in a drawer, lighting them one by one. “Let’s hope I don’t burn down my room,” she joked, deciding not to place any near her bed, in case they knocked one over.

“Candles?” Kara mused with a playful smile. The tension in her muscles dissipated visibly as she dropped her shoulders and shifted toward the middle of the bed. “That’s cheesier than I expected from you, but I like it.”

“Shut up,” Lena mumbled, blushing a soft shade of pink. “I want to make this special and a little romance never hurts anyone,” she commented as she crawled onto the bed. “Right?” she questioned, a bit uncertain, placing her index finger under Kara’s chin, tilting her head upward.

“It’s sweet,” Kara whispered, pecking Lena’s lips. “Thank you for…,” she gave a pause, eyes scanning the room before they settled on Lena’s. “Being you,” she said, tucking a stray lock of Lena’s raven hair behind her ear.

“Who’s being cheesy now?” Lena teased, clasping her fingers around Kara’s wrist, pushing her down.

“I could tell you to shut up, but I know a better way,” Kara replied, glancing at Lena’s lips.

Lena hummed. She could definitely get on board with that. She swung one leg over Kara’s, skin prickling as her clad center came in contact with Kara’s, and she was both grateful and resentful of that last remaining barrier between them. Her eyes darkened with hunger while she leaned down, capturing Kara’s lips with hers.

Kara’s lips were soft and full, parting beneath Lena, giving their tongues a chance to touch, to melt against each another as their bodies pressed more firmly into one other. Kara’s hands slid into Lena’s hair, tugging carefully yet demanding enough for a low groan to escape the back of Lena’s throat.

Lena nipped at Kara’s lower lip, backing away a couple of inches, sparing a couple of seconds to catch her breath and drown in the blue of Kara’s eyes. “So beautiful,” she uttered, attaching her lips to Kara’s neck.

“Le-Lena,” Kara trembled, voice raspy and low, filled with raw need. “Please.”

“Shhh,” Lena whispered, leaning up for a chaste kiss. “All in due time,” she promised, resuming what she was doing.

Lena’s lips explored the shell of Kara’s ear before she began to kiss lower, each press lasting longer than the last. She hooked her fingers underneath the straps of Kara’s bra, slowly sliding them down, giving attention to Kara’s shoulders. If she couldn’t tell Kara how she loved her, she at least wanted Kara to feel it with every touch.

There was a question in Kara’s eyes as her fingers toyed with the clasp of Lena’s bra, not quite unhooking it yet.

“It’s okay,” Lena assured Kara with a smile, though she did feel a bout of nerves, which she tried hard to suppress, for Kara’s sake. She knew where this night was headed, and she was ready, but it was like feeling around in the dark, exploring the unknown.

On the second try, Kara managed to rid Lena of her bra. “A little help?” she mumbled, grasping on to Lena while she tried to sit up.

“You can have a hand anytime,” Lena responded, pleased when Kara’s cheeks colored red all over again. She helped Kara to sit up better, unclasped her bra, and tossed it onto the floor, careful not to take down any of the candles.

“Can I…?” Kara’s breath caught as her gaze landed on the last piece of clothing which kept both her and Lena of being fully exposed. “Can I see you?”

Lena wasn’t sure if she should get up and take it off herself or not. “Do you want me to…?” she questioned, pointing at the space next to Kara.

“Yes, I, ah, please,” Kara answered, following Lena with her eyes.

“Hey,” Lena spoke up, snapping Kara out of her trance. “Are you nervous?” she asked, smiling softly as Kara nodded curtly. “It’s okay, I get nervous, too.”

“You do?” Kara replied, voice going up half an octave, eyes filled with intrigue. “But you… you appear so cool and composed, and sure. I don’t know how you do it, how you’re so confident.”

“From what I’ve picked up over the past weeks, you’ve shown plenty of confidence,” Lena praised in earnest. “We’ll take this slow, and if something becomes too much, you can tell me. Don’t forget to breathe, okay?”

Lena reminded herself how she, too, needed to breathe. She did just that while Kara’s fingers peeled her underwear away, leaving her bare.

“You’re gorgeous, Lena,” Kara said, awed. “Do you want to take off mine or should I?”

Lena was endeared how Kara had the same thought that went through her head moments ago. “Whichever you’re most comfortable with.”

“Hmm,” Kara hummed, rolling her lips into her mouth. She leaped out of bed, pushing down her underwear with a rushed, “you can do it next time.”

Lena’s jaw dropped before she composed herself. She wasn’t sure whether it was an honest mistake or something else, but in the end, she decided it was a force of habit, even though this was Kara’s first time.

Lena’s breath hitched, laying eyes upon Kara. She let them travel down long enough to take in the soft tuft of trimmed blonde locks between Kara’s legs, and seeing Kara like this made her blush hard.

Kara climbed back in bed, chewing her lip, biting back a smile while her cheeks colored tomato red.

Lena coaxed Kara to lie down with a kiss. “I’ll make you feel good,” she whispered, and she hoped she would.

Lena’s fingertips inched down Kara’s side. She looked Kara right in the eyes when she touched her _there_ for the first time, and that little choked gasp stumbling past Kara’s lips increased her arousal. “God, Kara, you’re so wet,” she moaned, running her fingers through Kara’s folds.

Kara whimpered when Lena teased her clit. “Mhmm,” she hummed, chest rising and falling a little faster. “Oh… Le-Lena, yes.”

Lena glanced down, licking her lips, wondering what Kara tasted like. Two of her fingers entered Kara, and god, that felt tight but warm, and as she began to thrust, Kara’s wetness increased.

Kara whimpered and moaned, fists clutching at the sheets. “Lena, please… yes, mhmm… oh, y-yes.”

Lena’s curiosity got the upper hand. She had to have a taste, so she spread Kara’s legs apart, sank onto her knees between them, grabbed hold of Kara’s thighs, and flattened her tongue against Kara’s center.

At the first swipe, Kara squirmed and arched her back. “Lena!” she keened. “That… oh, m-more.”

Lena smiled, taking Kara’s reaction as a sign she was doing something right. This was new territory for her, and it felt incredible. Every sound Kara made was like an orgasm in her ears. Kara tasted sweet and just a little bit tangy as she toppled over the edge.

“Fuck,” Lena groaned, so wound up one touch might suffice to make her come.

Lena kissed Kara’s thighs and her hips. When she reached Kara’s stomach, she felt muscles ripple beneath her lips. God, Kara was going to be the end of her. Slowly but surely, she trailed her way up to Kara’s clavicles, halting there because she wasn’t sure if Kara was okay with kissing right now.

Kara erased Lena’s doubts, smiling blissfully as she tangled a hand in Lena’s hair and pulled her in.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Lena sighed softly to herself. She had no idea what time it was, but she assumed it was late, probably past midnight already. If she turned her head to the side to catch a glimpse of the clock on her nightstand, she would stir too much, and she would have to lean over Kara, who fell asleep in her arms at some point.

No sleeping over was a rule, a boundary Lena had set before this arrangement began, and yet. She found it adorable how Kara got so exhausted she was out like a light all of a sudden. Deep down she knew she should wake up Kara and kindly urge her to leave, but the least she could do was let Kara sleep for a little bit, just an hour or so.

Lena moved the arm she didn’t curl around Kara after Kara had nuzzled herself onto her shoulder, reaching down for the blanket, grasping it to pull it up. She promptly covered Kara with her sheets, to ensure Kara wouldn’t be cold.

“What are you doing to me, Kara?” Lena whispered, so silently she mostly mouthed the words. “If only you knew how much you mean to me,” she sighed out, carding her fingers lightly through Kara’s hair.

Lena missed hearing Kara’s happy little hum the way she did before when she ran her fingers through Kara’s hair, but she knew she wasn’t going to get to listen to it this time because Kara was fast asleep. Not that it stopped her from stroking Kara’s hair, which felt like a reflex at this point, something she couldn’t resist doing.

Kara’s hand was splayed onto Lena’s bare stomach. Her other hand was tucked beneath Lena’s neck, and her cheek rested on Lena’s shoulder.

Lena wasn’t too worried about her nipple piercings. Kara wasn’t wearing any earrings or other jewelry, although she figured it was possible Kara’s hair could get stuck. The more she thought about it, the more she decided it didn’t matter if she could enjoy this moment for as much as one more minute. If she would never get to hold Kara like this again, she wanted to make the most of what she had right here right now.

“You’re special,” Lena whispered, brushing Kara’s hair gently behind her ear. “You almost make me want to sing a lullaby to you, and I never sing to anyone, ever. I hardly even sing happy birthday, which Leslie can testify for me,” she shared with a smile, and it didn’t matter she was talking to nothing but the darkness of the night.

“I’m sleepy too if I’m honest,” Lena yawned, blinking her eyes in an attempt to keep them open.

Kara’s chest rose and fell slowly. Strands of her hair tickled Lena’s skin. Her palm was warm on Lena’s stomach. Underneath the sheets, her legs were tangled with Lena’s.

Lena carefully turned her head enough to kiss Kara’s forehead. “I should have asked you out when we met for the first time, back in the library, when we shared a table together. I can’t think of many regrets when I think about you, but I do regret not gathering the courage to ask. Last year, during our freshman year, I had a crush on you, but I never dared to approach you to do anything about it,” she whispered with a bittersweet smile. “I may not be the player everyone thinks I am, considering you were my first, but you deserve better than me.”

Lena let her eyes flutter shut, just for a few seconds. She wasn’t going to doze off, all she needed was a brief moment to rest. Perhaps a couple of minutes would suffice, five tops.

The last thing Lena registered was fingertips caressing up and down her arm, slow and gentle, light as a butterfly while soft lips kissed the underside of her jaw.

 


	10. Chapter 10

Lena awoke to a small ray of sunlight filtering through the curtains. Her hands came up with nothing but her sheets, which had her frowning because if her memory served her right, Kara fell asleep in her arms at some point during the night, and she passed out when she had only intended to grant her eyes some rest.

“Kara?” Lena whispered, voice somewhat hoarse and sleep-ridden. “Kara?” she tried again, a tad louder as she peered around her room, only to conclude Kara wasn’t there.

A pit formed in Lena’s stomach. Perhaps Kara woke up throughout the night and left in a panic. God, she should have stirred Kara, especially if she thought back to that day they lost track of time, and Kara hurried out the door because her sister would kill her.

If she thought she did Kara a solid by letting her rest, she was wrong. Lena realized it was selfish, and that she only did herself a favor. At that moment, it had felt right to hold Kara after they were intimate together.

Her room was on the warmer side. Nonetheless, a gush of cold air hit Lena as she pushed her sheets aside, and slipped out of her bed. She hoped her friendship with Kara wasn’t ruined beyond repair because she would rather have Kara in her life as a friend than not have her in it at all.

The second Lena stepped out of her room, she noticed something was off. Leslie said she wouldn’t be back until Sunday, and since it was only Saturday morning, her best friend couldn’t be behind why the scent of pancakes filled her nostrils. That and Leslie didn’t have a habit of making such breakfast. Hell, during the weekends her best friend often slept in until noon.

Lena tiptoed as quietly as she could toward the kitchen to quell her curiosity. She stilled in the doorframe, green eyes sparkling while she observed Kara flipping a pancake. From the looks of it, Kara was wearing one of her shirts. It was a black one from Linkin Park, which she picked up at a concert she went to with Leslie three years ago.

Kara’s bare legs were on display. The shirt was barely long enough to cover her underwear. She swayed her hips while she hummed a melody, singing a few words here and there. With a flourish, she placed the pancake atop a plate filled with several more.

“Good morning, sleeping beauty,” Kara said with a chuckle and a smile the moment she noticed Lena. “I borrowed one of your shirts, and I figured I’d make breakfast to apologize for falling asleep. I hope that’s okay.”

Lena stretched her arms, yawning as she padded into the kitchen. “Morning,” she murmured, rubbing her eyes. “You didn’t have to go through all this trouble for me, silly,” she told Kara with a smile.

“Hmm no, but I wanted to, so you’ll just have to deal with it.”

Lena guffawed. “Are you sassing me now?” she replied, snaking her arms around Kara’s waist, tickling her sides, smiling again as Kara squirmed in her embrace. “You better not burn those pancakes.”

“Said the one who trapped me in her arms,” Kara quipped.

“Oh, I’m sorry, did you need a hand?”

Kara’s eyes flicked down to Lena’s lips.

Lena slid a hand into Kara’s hair. Her heart fluttered at the thought Kara was thinking about kissing her. She was happy Kara actually stayed, but she was also surprised why she didn’t leave as if something was on fire.

Lena contemplated her words for a moment, deciding to say something along the lines of _‘you’re still here’_ sounded cold and as if Kara wasn’t welcome. “I can’t believe you stayed long enough to make me breakfast,” she whispered with a light chuckle, eyes lighting up when Kara smacked her lightly on the arm.

“You’re not going to be in any trouble will you?” Lena questioned, voice laced with concern. She carded her fingers through Kara’s hair, hoping there would be no backlash because the last thing she wanted was for the girl she loved to get problems, let alone because of her.

Kara sighed softly and leaned in, cupping Lena’s cheeks while she kissed her, thumbs caressing Lena’s skin.

It took Lena a second to catch up on the fact Kara was kissing her and responding to said kiss. She pulled Kara closer by her hips, indulging in this moment for the blissful brief time it lasted, groaning when Kara pulled away far too soon.

Kara let out another chuckle. “I figured you’d be hungry, but clearly you’re thirsty, too.”

Lena wasn’t going to let Kara get to her that easily. “Too, hm? You sound like you know what you’re talking about,” she shot back with a wink. Her lips curled into a smirk while Kara simply stared at her. “Checkmate, darling,” she teased, realizing a beat too late terms of endearment weren’t allowed, as per what she had said.

Well, fuck it, Lena broke enough of the rules she created, so one more wasn’t going to make a difference. If she thought about it, the only ones they didn’t break was how public displays of affection weren’t allowed, and how this was a one-time deal. Not that she intended to let those slide as well.

“You can take a shower after breakfast if you want,” Lena offered while she set the table under the guise she knew where everything was, though in truth she merely wanted to help instead of leaving Kara to do all of the work.

“I’d like that,” Kara replied, nodding. “Would you mind if I hold on to this for a little while longer?” she asked, plucking at Lena’s shirt.

Lena shook her head, and the reminder Kara was wearing her shirt made her heart flutter. She would love to see Kara in more of her clothes because there was an appeal to it, and her shirt looked a lot better on Kara than it ever did on her.

“Do you have some whipped cream or maple syrup or something?” Kara asked, staring at the cupboards, appearing as if her fingers ached to look through them like she didn’t already when she gathered the ingredients to make pancakes.

“There should be some maple syrup around here somewhere,” Lena hummed thoughtfully. “Leslie likes that sticky stuff.”

“Your roommate has good taste then.”

“Food-wise I have no doubt you two would get along,” Lena said with a smile. “I don’t know what will give me cavities first, looking at your plate full of sugar or how sweet you are.”

“Stop that!” Kara chuckled, cheeks bright red.

Lena moved past Kara to make some coffee because really, her morning wasn’t complete without a cup. “Let me guess,” she sighed while she made enough for two. “Milk and extra sugar?”

“Maybe,” Kara mumbled, pulling back a chair. “I’d take orange juice over coffee any day.”

Lena feigned a gasp. “Shh, she didn’t mean that. Don’t listen to her,” she whispered to the cups of coffee.

“You’re a dork,” Kara announced with the biggest, brightest smile. “That’s why I really-” Her pupils widened momentarily, and then she cleared her throat. “I’ll drink it how you drink it, I’m not too picky.”

Lena sat next to Kara while they ate their breakfast. It wasn’t long until she got roped into trying a bite of Kara’s maple syrup drowned pancakes. As predicted, it was far too sweet and sticky, but Kara’s smile each time she tried some was worth it.

Kara scooped up as much as she could fit onto her fork, waggling her eyebrows as she held it out to Lena.

“That’s way too much,” Lena said with a shake of her head. “It’ll drip down my chin.”

“You could take a shower with me after breakfast,” Kara blurted out, eyes going round. “I-I mean! Because, ah, I… I’ve already seen you naked, so, ah, I thought… I just…erm, it’s an option if you’re all sticky,” she explained, smoothing her hair over her shoulder as she voiced the last bit with a casual tone. Her jaw dropped when Lena raised an eyebrow at her.

“Because of the maple syrup!” Kara added in a rush, cheeks crimson. “The syrup is sticky!”

“I’ll think about it,” Lena decided with a wink, though she wouldn’t have enough willpower to shower with Kara without kissing her. Even now she wanted to do nothing more than lean in and capture Kara’s lips.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Lena knew her timing often wasn’t perfect, not by a long stretch, but to be fair, she had no idea she would find herself running into Alex when most of her peers were probably off having pizza or something else for dinner.

Alex’s fists were clenched at her sides, and her jaw was tense. “Luthor,” she acknowledged, tone not hostile, but not particularly friendly either.

“Look, I didn’t sleep with your girlfriend,” Lena informed Alex with a sigh. _But I did sleep with your sister,_ she thought, which Alex definitely didn’t need to know about because she had no doubt the oldest Danvers sister would give her hell for it, given her shitty reputation.

Alex uncurled her fingers, sighing as she relaxed her hands. “I know,” she replied, slipping her hands into her pockets. “Sam told me what happened, and I believe her. I shouldn’t have jumped to conclusions as fast as I did.”

Lena thought of commenting that was good because trust was necessary for a relationship, but she decided to keep those words to herself. “I thought you were going to punch me,” she shared with a wry smile, wishing she was kidding.

“Sam told me you passed up her offer to share her bed,” Alex said, scooting the tip of her shoe over the ground. “Maybe you’re not so bad, Luthor.”

“I’m sure you’re not so bad yourself, Danvers.”

“Say, do you want to grab some dinner?” Alex inquired, sounding sincere. “Sam and I are meeting up with my sister, and our friends Imra, and Lucy. I think you know my sister. Kara.”

Lena wasn’t sure if Kara had ever mentioned her to Alex or what she said if she did. “Yes, I saw her a few times at the library,” she confirmed with some hesitation. “I’m not sure it’s a good idea. I wouldn’t want to inconvenience anyone. It sounds like a dinner among friends.”

“Shut up and say yes, Lena,” Sam’s voice cut in when she appeared next to Alex, leaning onto her shoulder.

“I can’t do both at once, despite my multitasking skills.”

“It’s almost like you can’t nod,” Sam quipped. “Oh wait…”

Lena grinned. “You’re such a bitch, Sam,” she chuckled, glad when Sam smiled rather than being offended.

Alex’s eyes shifted between Sam and Lena. “So, what do you say?”

“Fine, I’ll accept dinner,” Lena relented with a sigh. “A standard apology would have sufficed, you know?” she said to Alex, not out of malice but because she saw no need in being treated to dinner. It was a little over the top for her taste, and she had the feeling Alex was making an effort for Sam’s sake.

Alex sighed audibly. “I’m sorry about the rumor,” she half-muttered, but there was a flicker of pity in her eyes. “It’s shitty people are going around, saying you hooked up with Sam when you didn’t.”

“It’s nothing I’m not used to,” Lena whispered quietly to herself, scoffing at the bittersweet irony. Everything, her whole reputation was based upon false rumors, and she never asked for that. It wasn’t cool or fun, or great to be popular that way. If asked, she would rather be a wallflower, the kind of going unnoticed by her peers.

Lena slowed her steps when she saw Sam and Alex were headed toward the diner across the street. She breathed easier the second she realized Siobhan wasn’t working tonight because she was on a trip for the weekend with Leslie, so there was no risk of any flirting in front of Kara. In hindsight, she should have found a decent excuse to dodge the dinner invite altogether.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Kara’s eyes went round the second Lena entered the diner while her jaw dropped. She recovered after a subtle – Lena saw, but Sam and Alex didn’t – nudge from Imra.

“Lena! Hi!” Kara beamed, smile beautifully bright. “What, ah…,” she said with a nervous chuckle, eyes darting around, “are you doing here?”

“Alex and I invited her,” Sam spoke up.

“Invited?” Lena scoffed, throwing a smile Sam’s way. “You damn near pushed me through the door.”

“I wouldn’t hang out with us either,” Sam shot back, grinning at the resounding symphony of _‘hey’s’_ from Alex, Kara, Lucy, and Imra.

Lena was caught completely, utterly off guard when Kara wrapped her arms around her, right in front of Alex no less! She was too shocked to react, so instead, she froze. Someone gasped, a shutter from a camera clicked, and someone clapped their hands together, which made Kara jump, breaking the contact.

“Okay then,” Alex said, voice a little funny, averting her eyes. “I take it you two know each other quite well.”

“Looks like it,” Lucy commented. “Kara’s quite energetic tonight. Go figure, considering she slept in until noon. Imra and I tried to stir her, but nope.”

“I, hah,” Kara chuckled, combing her hair behind her ears. “I was tired?”

Lena rolled her eyes while Imra elbowed Lucy, who was grinning all sly, and to her, that confirmed those two dum-dums knew. She didn’t even have to ask Kara; Lucy’s expressions said it all. It wasn’t ideal, but considering Kara slept over at her place, she didn’t mind Lucy and Imra knowing, as long as Sam and Alex didn’t.

“We did exhaust her a lot last night,” Lucy said, winking at Kara, whose cheeks turned two shades redder.

“Maybe you’re simply too exhausting, Luce,” Imra teased, smiling while Lucy guffawed.

Lucy wound her arms around Imra’s neck. “You’re lucky I like you,” she murmured, kissing Imra on the cheek.

“If you like me so much, you should go out with me sometime.”

“Oh my god you two,” Sam interrupted with a groan. “Just date each other already.”

“Ditto that,” Alex agreed.

“Nah,” Lucy replied, leaving one arm around Imra’s shoulders. “We love each other too much to rush things.”

“Take all the time you need,” Kara told Lucy and Imra.

Lena wondered if Lucy was still hung up on Leslie, and hurt because of how that went down. While the others muttered on for a bit, she took the only seat which was still free, and that one happened to be across from Kara, who kept giving her slight smiles.

“Did you know Kara snores?” Lucy asked, smirking when they were about to eat half an hour after they settled down with drinks. “Imagine listening to that until noon.”

“I do not snore!” Kara objected, narrowing her eyes at Lucy, but all she accomplished was to look adorable, like a pouting puppy.

Lena bit back a smile, reaching for her soda to occupy her mouth before she slipped out a comment. Kara didn’t snore, not as far as she heard, and she had a feeling Lucy damn well knew she didn’t.

“You’re such a tease,” Imra smiled at Lucy. “Speaking of sounds, you talk in your sleep sometimes.”

“So does Alex,” Sam shared.

“Sam,” Alex groaned, dropping her fork. “Really?”

“Yes, really,” Sam insisted. “Facts are facts, babe.”

“Just because it’s a fact doesn’t mean everyone else needs to know. Take a guess where you’re sleeping tonight.”

Sam placed a hand on Alex’s jaw and gazed into her eyes. “Where?” she asked, leaning in a little, but not enough yet to press her lips to Alex’s.

“That’s not fair, and you know it,” Alex replied, closing the gap.

“Right in front of my pasta?” Lucy commented. “Do you two always need to be too gay to function?”

“You’re one to talk,” Sam shot back.

“I have no idea what you’re on about,” Lucy shrugged, sharing a bite of her food with Imra.

“Ignore them,” Kara told Lena. “That’s what I do.”

“It’s fine,” Lena assured Kara with a smile.

And it was, though Lena did worry any more teasing might lead to Sam and Alex catching on to something. In different circumstances, she wouldn’t have minded Sam knowing, but in the current one, she had no doubt Sam shared many things with Alex, probably more than she should.

“What’s the deal between you two?” Alex inquired abruptly, eyes drifting from Lena to Kara, and back.

Kara knocked over her glass. “What? What deal?” she asked, voice high, grimacing as she accepted tissues from Imra. “Lena and I know each other, from the library. We studied together. She helped me with math.”

“Since when do you need help with math?” Alex questioned, frowning. “The only topic you ever needed help with was history.”

Lena should have fucking locked herself in for the entire weekend because Alex shared a curious look with Sam, and now two sets of eyes were on Kara and her, while Lucy and Imra fell noticeably silent.

 


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's been 84 years, but here's the update.

“Imra and I are dating!” Lucy blurted out, cutting through the silence. “We tried to keep it silent-”

“Sounds like it,” Sam commented with a sideways grin.

“But I guess you all noticed anyway,” Lucy finished, swinging an arm around Imra’s shoulders, kissing her on the cheek.

Imra turned her head to the side, eyes sparkling as she gazed into Lucy’s. “We thought we kept it under wraps pretty well.”

“Think again,” Alex mumbled.

“I have to admit, you got us good,” Sam sighed, smiling at Imra and Lucy. “I thought you were serious about the whole taking it slow.”

“Oh, we are,” Lucy replied, nodding. “We just didn’t want anyone to make a big deal about it.”

Five minutes ago, Lena could have glared daggers at Lucy and Imra, in particular Lucy for being a little shit. But now she felt like hugging both of them for abruptly changing the topic. She didn’t need Alex to start scrutinizing what she had with Kara. It was all in the past now anyway, so it was hardly relevant.

The voices around Lena became background noise. She saw Kara wrap her arms around Imra and Lucy while saying something, probably along the lines of congratulating them. Even though a bullet was dodged, she wanted to go home and listen to some music, away from possible drama and unwanted questions.

Lena cleared her throat once the others had settled down and resorted to hushed whispers. “I forgot there is a book I wanted to finish this weekend,” she began while she moved her chair back. “Thanks for…,” _making this an uncomfortable experience_. “Dinner,” she finished with a thin smile.

Sam’s eyebrows creased together. “Okay, I could walk you back?”

Lena shook her head. “It’s literally right across the street, I’m sure I’ll be fine on my own,” she replied, standing up.

“Well, don’t be a stranger,” Lucy spoke up.

“You’re always welcome to hang out with us sometime,” Imra added.

“I’ll check my calendar,” Lena chuckled, though stabbing herself with a fork sounded more appealing than repeating a night like this.

Kara rolled her lips into her mouth. There was a flicker of something akin to disappointment in her eyes. “I’ll see you around sometime,” she said, voice a little strained.

Lena gave a brief nod. She didn’t quite want to say goodbye either, and it was possible she would run into Kara sometime at the library or in between classes. With an aching chest, she went home, picked out music, and turned the volume all the way up in an attempt to drown out every memory of Kara.

The pain grew when Lena concluded that no matter how loud a song played, it didn’t drown out her thoughts. She took a shower, but every fingerprint was burned into her skin, etched underneath it, and she knew loving Kara was a mistake, but she couldn’t stop her feelings.

“I wish you could see the real me,” Lena sighed quietly, thumb hovering over Kara’s contact, pending whether she should text her or not. “But if you did, would you like me for me?” she wondered aloud with a bittersweet smile while tears slid down her cheeks.

“Each kiss and every touch was real to me. It wasn’t some arrangement, some favor,” Lena whispered, locking her phone. “I love you, and you’ll never know. It’s too late,” she said, squeezing her fingers around her cell. “I love you, but it doesn’t matter.”

Lena’s eyes drifted up, meeting her reflection in the mirror. “What are you afraid of? A broken heart?” she scoffed, balling her free hand into a fist. “You broke your own damn heart, coward!” she shouted, punching the mirror until it shattered.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Lena woke up to the sound of bottles clattering together and a string of curses. She hardly got the chance to sit up when her door swung open, revealing her best friend stumbling into her room with a bottle of vodka and two glasses.

“Ouch,” Leslie muttered when she stubbed her toe against the closet. “Fucking hell,” she grumbled, banging the door with her elbow.

“Leslie?” Lena sighed, voice groggy while she swung her legs over the side of the bed. “It’s Sunday morning,” she noted, glancing at her clock. “It’s not even nine yet, I thought you wouldn’t be back until later.”

“Yeah well, change of plans,” Leslie replied with an audible sigh. “Scoot,” she mumbled, swaying slightly on her feet as she moved closer to Lena’s bed.

Lena rubbed her eyes and slid closer to her headboard. Drinking was somewhat tempting, but her body begged her to wake up first, and she wasn’t too fond of consuming alcohol on an empty stomach.

Leslie placed the glasses on the nightstand. “You want sum?” she inquired, already filling up one of them.

“Maybe later,” Lena answered, smoothing her hair back.

“More for me then,” Leslie shrugged, pouring the second glass as well.

“Whoa, whoa,” Lena interrupted, reaching for both of Leslie’s hands, noticing how they shook in hers. “What happened?” she questioned with a frown, running her thumbs over her best friend’s knuckles.

Leslie groaned and dropped her head, shooting it back up, eyes wide as she grasped Lena’s wrists and turned her hands over.

Lena chewed her lip guiltily as Leslie’s eyes studied the fresh wounds on her knuckles. “The mirror,” she revealed, pulling her hands away from Leslie’s.

“We’re gonna talk about this,” Leslie said with a thoughtful nod.

“In due time,” Lena agreed. “But first you’re going to tell me what happened for you to stumble in here like this,” she insisted, scrunching up her nose at the waft of alcohol which clung to her best friend.

Lena took a moment to observe Leslie now that she started to wake up more. Her friend’s hair looked like a bit of a tangled birds nest, in need of a comb. The skin around Leslie’s eyes bordered on red, presumably from rubbing at her skin to get rid of tears. Leslie’s shirt was on inside out, her lips were chapped, and the skin next to her nails appeared bitten.

“Les…,” Lena whispered, voice soft as she brushed her fingers through Leslie’s hair, tucking it behind her ears.

“It’s Siobhan,” Leslie sighed, swallowing thickly as Lena gave an understanding nod. “I kinda drank a lot, and I wasn’t drunk, but you could say I had some liquid courage. We were hanging out, dancing and having a good time. I suck at dancing, and I hate it, but we were just having a laugh, y’know?”

“Anyways,” Leslie mumbled, continuing. “The music wasn’t even corny or anything like that, but she was close, and I got lost in her eyes. Cliché as fuck,” she explained, scoffing. “I hooked my fingers underneath the suspenders she had on. Fuck, she’s so hot, I couldn’t help myself. So I pulled her in, and I kissed her.”

“You have it bad for her, hm?” Lena noted, never having known her best friend to be so crazy about someone before. “How did she react?”

“I have no fucking clue, beats me,” Leslie answered, half-laughing, half in tears. “When I kissed her, I sort of freaked out and I bolted, leaving her there. I went to a different club, drank some more, and eventually I hitchhiked to get back here.”

Lena was tempted to slap some sense into Leslie because hitchhiking, seriously!? That was incredibly dangerous and stupid, but the last thing her best friend needed right now was for her to berate her on something like that, so she took a few deep breaths to calm down.

Lena opened her arms, unsure if Leslie would want a hug, but her doubts washed away when Leslie flung her arms around her.

“We’ll get through this, together,” Lena assured her best friend, stroking Leslie’s hair and her back. “For all you know, she likes you back.”

Leslie scoffed. “Yeah right, anyone with a pair of eyes can see she’s way out of my league,” she mumbled, holding Lena tighter. “She’s like a twelve and I’m not even a five.”

“Hey, that’s not true,” Lena objected, backing away enough to cradle Leslie’s face in her hands. “You’re my best friend, and you’ll always be a solid twenty to me,” she said from the bottom of her heart. “For better or for worse.”

“Now you’re being grossly emo,” Leslie replied, making a face while she pushed Lena’s hands away.

Leslie blinked away a tear. “Thanks,” she uttered quietly, squeezing Lena’s hand once. “I thought about texting her I was drunk or something, but that doesn’t explain why I ran like a scared chicken. I’ve turned off my phone, couldn’t deal with what she might have to say.”

“You can take your time to gather your thoughts. I’m sure she’ll understand what happened was a shock to you, and from the connection I’ve seen between you two, I doubt she’d let everything go to waste,” Lena said reassuringly. “You’re not less beautiful than Siobhan. Diamonds are pretty and so are ruins, and those look nothing alike. If someone can’t see what you have to offer, fuck them.”

“You might wanna take a page out of your own book,” Leslie sighed, smiling just a little. “How did your weekend go? Did you and Kara…?”

Lena took a deep breath in and slowly breathed out. “We did,” she answered, curling her fingers into fists, ignoring the way her knuckles ached.

“Does she know you were…?”

Lena shook her head. Her eyes stung because she should have, but she wasn’t sure if it would have made much of a difference. Sharing her first time with Kara wasn’t magically going to make Kara love her.

“Oh, Lee…,” Leslie whispered, catching a teardrop that rolled down Lena’s cheek with her thumb. “This is probably a dumb question, but how do you feel about that?”

“I don’t regret it,” Lena voiced, wanting that to be clear, first and foremost. “Being intimate with Kara felt incredible. I felt as if I was right where I needed to be. It wasn’t about sex, not to me. It was sharing a deeply intimate moment with someone I love dearly.”

“Sounds like you got it bad, too,” Leslie noted. “Let me guess, you broke more of your rules.”

Lena smiled at the bittersweet irony of how well her best friend knew her. “Kara fell asleep, so I let her stay the night. I know it went against the rules I personally set, but at this moment it doesn’t matter anymore. It’s all in the past now, gone,” she explained, shrugging it off as if it was nothing while it was everything to her.

“I gave Kara the firsts she asked for,” Lena concluded. “And I…” Her breath caught, making it difficult to talk as she fought back the tears. “She was my first, and that’s okay. I made my decision, and as I said, I don’t regret it, not for a second. I only wish it could have lasted longer and that it would be more than some made up deal under the false pretense I’m an experienced player who sleeps with girls on the left and right.”

 

 

* * *

 

 

Lena didn’t have any contact whatsoever with Kara as a week went by. She went to the library every day, like a hopeless lovesick puppy, waiting for Kara to show up so they could spend time together the way they used to, but Kara never showed up. The possibility Kara was avoiding her stung, though she tried to brush it off and consider the fact Kara was merely busy.

“Looks like it’s just us tonight,” Lena said with a sigh as she reached for the remote and switched on the television.

Lena chuckled at the bitter thought how her peers were probably gossiping about who she was allegedly sleeping with this time, while in truth she was spending her Saturday night all by herself. Her best friend wasn’t around because Leslie said she was meeting up with Siobhan at a bar somewhere to talk.

Lena hoped Leslie wouldn’t get her heart crushed. She knew firsthand how much unrequited love hurt, and she didn’t wish that feeling upon anyone, especially not her best friend who deserved the world.

“You’d never let me down,” Lena mumbled to herself as she tried to choose something to watch on Netflix. “Let’s see which suggestions you have for me this-”

There was a knock on the door, followed by another.

Lena tossed the remote aside and frowned. Surely Leslie wasn’t back yet, and she was pretty sure she saw her snatch up her keys. “Coming!” she called out, flattening her palms on the couch, pushing herself upright.

Lena swung the door open without a second thought, completely forgetting she put on sweats and a black shirt with a faded print that wasn’t even readable anymore. Hence the first word out of her mouth when she saw Kara clad in jeans and a button-down was, “fuck.”

“Yes, please,” Kara replied with a chuckle, cheeks reddening immediately after. “I mean, ah, that was too straightforward,” she stammered, running her fingers through her hair, ducking her head. “Let me try that again. You look beautiful by the way.”

Lena glanced down at her outfit and then back up with one eyebrow raised. “Seriously?” she commented with a hint of a smile tugging at her lips. “Are your glasses that foggy?”

“Hey!” Kara guffawed, smacking Lena’s arm. “You look beautiful no matter what you do or don’t wear. You can’t change my mind.”

“So,” Lena uttered, leaning against the doorpost, “what brings you here on this fine Saturday evening?”

“You,” Kara blurted out. “I, ah, I was wondering if maybe, erm,” she tried, wringing her hands together. “If you don’t mind, ah, we could, ah, practice mo-”

Lena fisted a hand into Kara’s shirt and pulled her into her, stumbling inside. She blindly shut the door while their lips overlapped one another. They bumped into the table, and knocked into the wall, before making their way into her bedroom. Her hands eagerly rid Kara of her clothes while Kara attempted to take off hers. Seconds later, they fell onto her bed together, naked.

“Yes,” Lena whimpered, inwardly cursing herself for sounded so pathetically needy. “More practice will be good,” she said, inhaling the heady scent of Kara’s arousal, eyes drinking in the slick wetness between Kara’s legs.

Lena moaned while a little voice inside of her head told her Kara might want her as much as she wanted Kara. She took Kara being wet already as a good sign, ignoring the fact lust and desire didn’t equal love, blocking out the voice which reminded her she said they would only do this one time.

“Err, right… yes,” Kara replied, pulling Lena closer. “More practice is better,” she agreed. “I’m only here for…,” she trailed off, eyes searching Lena’s before she stole a quick kiss, thumbs caressing Lena’s cheeks ever so softly. “Practice,” she sighed, resting her lips against Lena’s. 

“But,” Kara hushed, running her thumb across Lena’s bottom lip.

Lena’s heart sank and god she hated that word. Why did there have to be a but? Why couldn’t they let this moment be what it was and worry about the complications later? But deep down she knew better, knew being this impulsive would get her burned.

Lena held her breath. “But?” she inquired, keeping her expressions neutral.

“This time I want to make you feel good,” Kara answered, eyes dipping down to Lena’s lips. Her eyelashes fluttered when she lifted her gaze. “I want to practice what you taught me because your opinion matters, and I…I think you deserve to have a good time. Plus I did some research, sort of,” she explained, cheeks bright red. “So let me, okay…?”

Lena released the breath she held, allowing Kara to shift on top of her. “Okay,” she agreed, carding her fingers through Kara’s hair, tucking a lock behind her ear. “Okay,” she repeated, guiding Kara down into a slow, passionate kiss.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more chapter and it's a wrap.


	12. Chapter 12

Kara licked into Lena’s mouth, running her tongue around Lena’s tongue piercing before sucking gently. Her hands inched down Lena’s sides, slowly moving back up, touching the side of Lena’s breasts.

Lena enjoyed the warmth of Kara’s skin on hers. The longer their kiss lasted, the more she felt a fire ignite inside of her. There was nothing shy or hesitant about the way Kara touched her, every move was filled with calculated confidence, making her whimper ever so quietly.

“Beautiful,” Kara murmured, pecking Lena’s lips. “Gorgeous,” she hummed, kissing the corner of Lena’s mouth, working her way toward Lena’s neck.

Lena smiled while Kara complimented her some more. “Charmer,” she whispered, though she wasn’t sure if Kara heard her. She shuddered when Kara took her earlobe into her mouth, barely holding back a moan.

Kara kissed the shell of Lena’s ear before bringing her lips lower again. She ran the tip of her index finger around one of Lena’s nipples, dodging the piercing Lena had there while fire danced in her eyes.

Lena placed one hand on Kara’s back and the other on her hip. This intimate moment felt like a shared secret between them. She found that the thrill of her best friend catching her with Kara turned her on more, made it deliciously sinful.

Kara spread Lena’s legs apart and sat down between them. She leaned forward, running her tongue along Lena’s right nipple piercing, followed by the left, switching between the two.

“Mhmm, Kara,” Lena moaned, arching into it, sliding her hands down Kara’s shoulders.

Kara slowed her movements, torturously so. “Does that feel good, baby?” she asked, humming without gazing up at Lena.

Lena was glad Kara didn’t look at her because she was about ninety percent certain she was blushing. It was endearing how Kara called her baby, whether it was an accident or not. “Yes, very good,” she answered, releasing a relaxed sigh. “You’re amazing at this,” she praised, shuddering once more as Kara’s fingertips left invisible marks on her skin.

Kara ducked lower, showering Lena’s stomach with open-mouth kisses, whispering sweet words of how beautiful she thought Lena was. She stopped when she reached Lena’s hipbones, glancing up with a naughty smile.

Lena gasped as Kara’s hands moved up her thighs. “Kara,” she moaned, groaning when Kara stopped.

Kara chuckled. “Soon,” she promised with a wink.

Lena’s breath got stuck in the back of her throat at the way Kara brought her face closer to hers, and due to how Kara slowly ran her tongue across her lips. “Tease,” she mumbled, sighing happily when Kara kissed her.

Kara’s mouth was hot on Lena’s, tongue slow and passionate as if she had all the time in the world.

The intensity of their kiss made Lena dizzy, made her yearn for more while Kara pulled away. If she didn’t need air, she would have surged up to connect their lips all over again.

Kara spread Lena’s legs further apart, dragging her lips up Lena’s thighs, adding just a bit of teeth here and there, soothing each bite with her tongue. She took her time getting closer to Lena’s center, and when she did, she smiled cheekily at Lena.

Lena smiled back purely because Kara’s smile was contagious. “What?” she questioned, surprised Kara’s cheeks weren’t that red while hers burned.

“You…,” Kara sighed out, pressing a kiss to Lena’s thigh. “You’re beautiful.”

“So are you,” Lena replied, smiling wider when Kara did blush at that. “You’re surprisingly charming tonight.”

“I would have offered you a ride on my horse, but alas I spent my allowance on food.”

“You can always come here if you want free food.”

Kara looked down and rested her index finger against Lena’s clit. “Oh, I know.”

Lena chuckled. “You are something else,” she whispered, feeling her heart beat faster because fuck, she really liked Kara a lot.

Kara grabbed the back of Lena’s thighs, bringing her center closer to her mouth. Her nose nudged Lena’s clit before she flattered her tongue, dragging it up Lena’s slit while Lena moaned.

“Oh my god, Kara!” Lena gasped out as Kara flicked her tongue around her sensitive bundle of nerves before she ran it through her folds. “Fuck!”

Kara teased Lena’s entrance, slowly entering her with two fingers while she sucked on her clit.

The combination of Kara’s fingers and her tongue made Lena clutch the sheets tightly in her fists, murmuring a string of _‘fucks’_ while she tried not to come too fast.

Kara’s movements were unrelenting, speeding up as Lena’s moans increased.

“Oh yes… Kara, yes!” Lena pleaded, arching her back when Kara curled her fingers inside of her, hitting the spot that drove her mad. “Kara, oh fuck, Kara, I’m going to… fuck, oh fuck, yes!”

Kara slowed down after Lena came; fluttering kisses all over Lena’s thighs and hips.

Lena’s heart combusted at the tenderness. She offered to return the favor, but Kara wasn’t having any of it, so instead they kissed.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Lena sat on the couch with an untouched glass of water in her hands. Tonight’s events flooded back to her, along with the feeling of Kara’s hands all over her body. Kara left a while back, murmuring she couldn’t afford to stay as much as five more minutes.

Not that Lena expected Kara to stay or that she asked, although if Kara had wanted to, she would have let her. She didn’t want Kara’s warm, naked body to untangle from hers when they were in the middle of cuddling, but she understood Kara didn’t want her sister asking questions.

Lena heard the door swing open, followed by it slamming shut, though she didn’t budge. The water in her glass was much clearer than the tsunami of thoughts swirling in her head.

“Hey,” Leslie said, a grin on her face as she moved to sit next to Lena.

Lena took a quick sip from her water. “You seem to be in a good mood,” she noted, relieved Leslie didn’t storm off to her room in tears or anything like that. “Spill,” she prodded, nudging her best friend’s knee with hers.

“I had one hell of a night, in a good way,” Leslie smiled, running a hand through her hair, smoothing it back. “Siobhan and I had a couple of drinks, and she roped me into dancing. I swear that bitch knows all she has to do is bat her eyelashes, and I’m a goner. She stuck close to me, making me feel like my body was on fire. Fuck, it was intense.”

“Sure sounds it,” Lena hummed. Seeing her best friend all smiley was making her feel a tad better.

“She pushed me against the wall,” Leslie continued, touching her fingertips to her lips. “And then she kissed me, saying she owed me one.”

“Oh snap, I like her attitude,” Lena said with a light chuckle.

“Mhmm same,” Leslie agreed. “We talked after that, and it turns out she feels the same. She didn’t want to ruin our friendship, so she never made a move, but when I kissed her that one time, she couldn’t stop thinking about what could be. Hence she confessed her feelings, and I confessed mine.”

Lena set her glass aside. “I’m so proud of you!” she exclaimed, hugging Leslie.

“Eww gross, get off of me,” Leslie laughed, patting Lena’s back.

Lena smiled and gave Leslie some personal space. “So you and Siobhan…?” she inquired carefully, raising a brow when Leslie blushed.

“Yeah, pretty much,” Leslie confirmed, tucking her hair behind her ears, averting her eyes. “Stop smiling at me like that. Yes, we’re dating.”

“I’m happy for you, Les,” Lena replied with a soft sigh.

“If you hug me again I’ll deck you.”

Lena chuckled. “No you won’t,” she doubted, lightly patting Leslie’s knee.

“Probably not,” Leslie mumbled. “But you never know,” she added with a shrug.

Lena raised her hands in defeat. “Netflix?” she asked, glancing at the remote.

It was late, past midnight already, but Lena wasn’t going to sleep anytime soon, and she doubted Leslie would either. She could do with the distraction to get out of her head for a bit. Perhaps letting Kara in tonight was a mistake, but she knew she would do it all over again if given a chance to go back.

“Yeah, sure why not,” Leslie answered, stretching. “I’m just gonna take a shower real quick. You go ahead and pick something. I’m fine with whatever.”

 

 

* * *

 

 

Weeks went by, turning into months. The end of the school year was nearing, and sometimes Lena let Kara in to practice. It felt like a lie, making her wonder if she somehow wordlessly agreed to become friends with benefits. She loved how at times they spent hours kissing, but every time Kara left her heart broke just a little.

Lena knew she couldn’t keep it up forever, and that someday she had to tell Kara they couldn’t keep seeing each other like that. She wanted a serious relationship, an honest chance. It was all she thought about as she left her last class for the day, which wouldn’t help her study for her finals.

Lena was stopped in the hall by a girl who asked for her phone number, but if she was honest, she didn’t even catch her name. She couldn’t focus, not when Kara was only a few steps away, looking directly at her. All she wanted was to walk up to Kara and hang out with her, even if all they did was go to the library to sit in silence together.

Kara smiled at Lena and even added a little wave, but her smile vanished entirely the second the girl who tried to get Lena’s attention flung her arms around Lena’s neck out of the blue, planting a kiss on Lena’s cheek.

Lena felt as if someone dumped a bucket of ice over her. It didn’t matter how the girl whispered hotly in her ear, not while Kara’s throat bobbed.

Kara averted her gaze, eyes glassy before she turned around with her head down and her shoulders tense.

“Kara!” Lena called out at the top of her lungs. “Don’t go, it’s not what it looks like!” she yelled, although, in all honesty, she didn’t owe Kara any explanation whatsoever, yet at the same time she felt she had to justify what was happening.

Kara did stop, sighing audibly as she turned around. “It’s fine, Lena,” she said, though her strained smile claimed otherwise. “You can do whatever you want. It’s your life, not mine. I have no say in what you do or who you hang out with. We’re not exclusive in any way. Kiss whoever you want to kiss. Everything is fine.”

“Like hell it is,” Lena blurted out, slightly louder than she intended as prying ears and eyes tuned in to their interaction. “Look, I’m not interested in her,” she stated, gesturing at the girl who tried to snatch up her number. “I’m sorry,” she said to the girl, cringing as the girl stomped off.

Lena turned her attention back to Kara, and while she did feel kind of bad for the girl, nobody should feel entitled to get her digits. It was her decision whether she handed out her number or not.

“I’m not interested in anyone,” Lena furthered her explanation. “Because I’m-”

“Not emotionally available,” Kara interrupted. “I know.”

Lena frowned. “No, that’s not…why do you?” she replied, but before Kara could answer it struck her she said so herself, once, in a passing conversation she had with Imra. “I am not interested in anyone because I’m interested in you, you idiot!” she confessed, definitely louder than she intended.

Lena chuckled bitterly at the irony. “God, Kara, you…,” she trailed off, smiling. She wondered if Imra striking up a conversation with her that time was nothing but a test, crafted by Kara. “Every touch and every kiss was genuine. The rumors about me are lies, and if you’d look me in the eyes you’d know-”

“That I was your first,” Kara filled in, sucking her lips into her mouth while she nodded stiffly. “I know,” she sighed. “I heard you that night.”

Lena tried not to wince at the series of gasps and hushed whispers from other students. The cat was out of the bag now, and she didn’t give a flying fuck whether they thought she made it up or actually for once believed the damn truth rather than some bullshit rumor.

“I’m not emotionally available because I’m in love with you!” Lena revealed, figuring she might as well go big or go home while she was at it. “You’re beautiful and smart, and you’re such a dork. The moments I spend with you are a part of the moments where I feel happy, just seeing you smile and hearing your voice. I liked you since our freshman year, and those feelings got stronger over time. I had a crush on you then, but it’s much deeper now.”

“Wait what?” Kara asked, jaw-dropping for a moment. “You…you have feelings… for, ah, me?”

Lena wasn’t sure whether Kara’s reaction was pure shock or disgust or both. “Yes,” she answered while her heart hammered so strongly she felt it in her throat. “I love you,” she stated, hoping her voice didn’t crack as much as it did in her ears. “And maybe there’s a slight possibility you feel the same?”

Kara slowly closed her mouth. Her whole body went rigid, not moving a single muscle. Lena wondered if Kara was still breathing because it didn’t look like she was.

“Kara??” Alex called out, and her sudden presence was just great, absolutely wonderful. “Are you in love with Lena Luthor?”

Lena sighed to herself because honestly using her full name like that wasn’t necessary. Alex could have asked _‘are you in love with her?’_ and everyone still would have gotten what she was talking about loud and clear.

Kara’s eyes went from Alex to Lena, and this was it, the moment where Lena would finally find out if the feelings she had for Kara were mutual. Students around them had stopped what they were doing and resorted fully to staring. Each second slipping by as Kara chewed her bottom lip was more excruciating than the last.

Lena never intended for this to be such a public event, tossed out in the open for everyone to witness. It wasn’t some grand plan to perform a romantic gesture. No, this had nothing to do with romance. Sharing her feelings meant letting go of her fear, putting her heart on the line, knowing it might wind up broken all over again.

Kara adjusted her glasses. She looked out of place, and the rapid rise and fall of her chest made Lena want to take her words back while moving as far away from all these people as possible. This was her doing, and while it was important to stop being so damn afraid of how she felt, it wasn’t fair of her to place such a burden onto Kara’s shoulders.

Leslie wove through the crowd. She put a comforting hand on Lena’s shoulder and glared at the other students, and Lena knew her best friend would fight every single one of them for her if they dared say one mean thing about her.

“Well, are you?” Alex insisted, arms crossed, frown settled on her face.

While Lena didn’t appreciate the added attention in the form of Kara’s sister, she wanted an answer too. She bit back the urge to prod, allowing Kara some time to gather her thoughts and decide what she wanted to say.

Lena thought back to the first time she was intimate with Kara, how she woke up the morning after to Kara making her breakfast. She remembered Kara was wearing her shirt that day. It was a happy memory, the kind she wanted to relive over and over again.

Kara looked down at the ground. Her fingers curled into fists, slowly relaxing while she lifted her head, meeting Lena’s eyes. “I’m sorry,” she mouthed, taking half a step back. “I…I…,” she said, letting her eyes roam around the crowd, rubbing her temples while she faltered more. “I don’t-”

“You love her,” Alex spoke up, causing Lena’s head to whip in her direction. “You love her,” she repeated, stronger, sounding surer while she approached Kara. “And that’s okay,” she added with a smile, squeezing Kara’s shoulder.

Lena forgot to breathe so much it was making her dizzy. Out of all people, she never would have guessed Alex would be the one to encourage Kara that it wasn’t a bad thing if she had feelings for her. All this time she thought Alex hated her, and only chose to tolerate her now and then for Sam’s sake. She was an idiot, a major one, who now understood she judged Alex far too quickly.

Kara placed her hand on top of Alex’s, whispering words nobody else could hear, followed by a hug.

Lena couldn’t move, couldn’t blink. She was frozen in place and when Kara looked at her, she didn’t know whether she should smile or cry. Feeling Leslie patting her shoulder reminded her she wasn’t alone.

And then Kara ran.

Fast.

Lena lost her balance when Kara barreled into her, but it mattered not. Tears streamed down her cheeks, and next thing she knew, Kara lifted her up and twirled her around once. When she looked into Kara’s eyes, she saw she was crying, too.

Kara cupped Lena’s cheeks and kissed her soundly on the lips.

Lena wrapped her arms around Kara, vowing she would make Kara happy.

For the first time since Lena went to college, students passed on the truth, telling others Lena Luthor was happily in love with Kara Danvers and vice versa.

Lena was skeptic about happy endings, but this wasn’t a happy ending.

This was the start of something beautiful and real.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Phew, that's a wrap, people. Let me know what you think. :)

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos and comments are appreciated. They motivate me to keep writing. :)
> 
> I'm @Silent_Rain91 on Twitter.


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